如云随风
悠然 随意 随缘
有位闺蜜, 每年一月份都会总结一下过去, 展望一下未来. 每次新年见面她的第一问都是:"你的new year resolution是什么?" 而我每次都像是第一次被问一样, 毫无思想准备的回答她"哟, 没想啊." 然后在她的注视和等候下, 我只得抓住脑子里冒出的第一个念头"那就be happy吧!" 于是年复一年, 每年的new year resolution都是be happy. 今年还没等到她发问, 有关快乐的警句和文章就都向我铺天盖地而来, 冥冥中感谢上苍没有忘记提醒我------- 今年的new year resolution仍然是be happy.
警句
Laugh when you can....
Apologize when you should.....
and let go of what you can't change....
love deeply and forgive quickly....
Life is too short to be anything but happy...
you have to take the good with the bad...
love what you have...
and always remember...that life goes on...
是的, 不管发生了什么, 明天的太阳仍然会照常升起.
转贴文章Can money make you happy?
Can money make you happy? An entire quantitative field of study, happiness economics, has grown up around that question.
One of the best studies on the subject was done by economist Angus Deaton and psychologist Daniel Kahneman, winner of a Nobel Prize for Economics. The two, both professors at Princeton University, found that day-to-day happiness increases as income approaches $75,000 a year, but then levels off. The reasoning is that having more money helps us cope with life's problems, so we feel less sad and stressed. At the $75,000-a-year cutoff point, Deaton says, money is no longer as big an issue.
But Deaton and Kahneman distinguish between day-to-day happiness and life satisfaction. People at every income level who see a rise in income consider themselves more successful. So for every 10% rise in income, people gain the same amount of satisfaction, whether they're making $50,000 or $500,000.
The two researchers conclude: “High incomes don't bring you happiness, but they do bring you a life you think is better.”In his book Rush: Why You Need and Love the Rat Race (Hudson Street Press), Todd Buchholz makes a convincing case that striving and achievement, which often correlate with higher salaries, enhance happiness. Buchholz, a former Harvard economics instructor and former White House adviser, says, “The truth is, most people have a deep need to work and to create.”
Note that Buchholz doesn't say owning more stuff makes us happier. Cornell University psychology professor Thomas Gilovich agrees─ at least, he says, more stuff doesn't make us happier for long. Gilovich, the author of , How We Know What Isn't So (The Free Press), explains that possessions give us short-lived pleasure because we're amazingly adaptable. When faced with a bad situation, adaptability can be very helpful─we adjust to the situation and it no longer bothers us as much. But when it comes to material things, such as a big-screen TV, the pleasure we take in them drops quickly. People who seek more stuff end up on "a hedonistic treadmill" he says.
It's much better, says Gilovich, to spend money on doing things rather than buying things. Experiences, such as vacations and barbecues with friends, don't seem to be as easily devalued by our adaptive abilities. “You get a lot more social value out of your experiences,” he says. “When you talk to people about your experiences, it tends to be an enjoyable conversation. You talk about material goods much less."
And our experiences don't lend themselves to easy comparisons, which gives them unique value. Gilovich points out that with a car, for example, comparisons are too easy: “Your car costs less money? It gets better mileage and it's more reliable? Argh! You have a better car than I do!”
But, he says, "What if you went to Bali and I went to Hawaii? Well, Bali's more exotic, but I went to Hawaii with friends and I have my memories, and I'm not worried by that comparison.”
钱钟书--- 论快乐
在旧书铺里买回来维尼Vigny的诗人日记Joural d’un pote，信手翻开，就看见有趣的一条。他说，在法语里，喜乐bonheur一个名词是“好”和“钟点”两字拼成，可见好事多磨，只是个把钟头的玩意儿Si le bonheur n’tait qu’une bonne denie。我们联想到我们本国话的说法，也同样的意味深永，譬如快活或快乐的快字，就把人生一切乐事的飘瞥难留，极清楚地指示出来。所以我们又慨叹说：“欢娱嫌夜短！”因为人在高兴的时候，活得太快，一到困苦无聊，愈觉得日脚像跛了似的，走得特别慢。德语的沉闷Langeweile一词，据字面上直译，就是“长时间”的意思。西游记里小猴子对孙行者说:“天上一日，下界一年。”这种神话，确反映着人类的心理。天上比人间舒服欢乐，所以神仙活得快，人间一年在天上只当一日过。从此类推，地狱里比人间更痛苦，日子一定愈加难度；段成式酉阳杂俎就说：“鬼言三年，人间三日。”嫌人生短促的人，真是最快活的人；反过来说，真快活的人，不管活到多少岁死，只能算是短命夭折。所以，做神仙也并不值得，在凡间已经三十年做了一世的人，在天上还是个初满月的小孩。但是这种“天算”，也有占便宜的地方：譬如戴孚广异记载崔参军捉狐妖，“以桃枝决五下”，长孙无忌说罚得太轻，崔答：“五下是人间五百下，殊非小刑。”可见卖老祝寿等等，在上最为相宜，而刑罚呢，应该到天上去受。
永远快乐-这句话，不但渺茫得不能实现，并且荒谬得不能成立。快过的决不会永久；我们说永远快乐，正好像说四方的圆形，静止的动作同样地自相矛盾。在高兴的时候，我们空对瞬息即逝的时间喊着说：“逗留一会儿罢！你太美了！”那有什么用？你要永久，你该向痛苦里去找。不讲别的，只要一个失眠的晚上，或者有约不来的下午，信仰更有效力，能使你尝到什么叫做“永生”的滋味。人生的刺，就在这里，留恋着不肯快走的，偏是你所不留恋的东西。
快乐在人生里，好比引诱小孩子吃药的方糖，更像跑狗场里引诱狗赛跑的电兔子。几分钟或者几天的快乐赚我们活了一世，忍受着许多痛苦。我们希望它来，希望它留，希望它再来──这三句话概括了整个人类努力的历史。在我们追求和等候的时候，生命又不知不觉地偷度过去。也许我们只是时间消费的筹码，活了一世不过是为那一世的岁月充当殉葬品，根本不会想到快乐。但是我们到死也不明白是上了当，我们还理想死后有个天堂，在那里──谢上帝，也有这一天！我们终于享受到永远的快乐。你看，快乐的引诱，不仅像电兔子和方糖，使我们忍受了人生，而且彷佛钓钩上的鱼饵，竟使我们甘心去死。这样说来，人生虽痛苦，却不悲观，因为它终抱着快乐的希望；现在的账，我们预支了将来去付。为了快活，我们甚至于愿意慢死。
穆勒曾把“痛苦的苏格拉底”和“快乐的猪”比较。假使猪真知道快活，那么猪和苏格拉底也相去无几了。猪是否能快乐得像人，我们不知道；但是人会容易满足得像猪，我们是常看见的。把快乐分肉体的和精神的两种，这是最糊涂的分析。一切快乐的享受都属于精神的，尽管快乐的原因是肉体上的物质刺激。小孩子初生了下来，吃饱了奶就乖乖地睡，并不知道什么是快活，虽然它身体感觉舒服。缘故是小孩子时的精神和肉体还没有分化，只是混沌的星云状态。洗一个澡，看一朵花，吃一顿饭，假使你觉得快活，并非全因为澡洗得干净，花开得好，或者菜合你口味，主要因为你心上没有挂碍，轻松的灵魂可以专注肉体的感觉，来欣赏，来审定。要是你精神不痛快，像将离别时的宴席，随它怎样烹调得好，吃来只是土气息，泥滋味。那时刻的灵魂，彷佛害病的眼怕见阳光，撕去皮的伤口怕接触空气，虽然空气和阳光都是好东西。快乐时的你一定心无愧怍。假如你犯罪而真觉快乐，你那时候一定和有道德、有修养的人同样心安理得。有最洁白的良心，跟全没有良心或有最漆黑的良心，效果是相等的。
发现了快乐由精神来决定，人类文化又进一步。发现这个道理，和发现是非善恶取决于公理而不取决于暴力，一样重要。公理发现以后，从此世界上没有可被武力完全屈服的人。发现了精神是一切快乐的根据，从此痛苦失掉它们的可怕，肉体减少了专制。精神的炼金术能使肉体痛苦都变成快乐的资料。于是，烧了房子，有庆贺的人；一箪食，一瓢饮，有不改其乐的人；千灾百毒，有谈笑自若的人。所以我们前面说，人生虽不快乐，而仍能乐观。譬如从写《先知书》的所罗门直到做《海风》诗的马拉梅（Mallarm），都觉得文明人的痛苦，是身体困倦。但是偏有人能苦中作乐，从病痛里滤出快活来，使健康的消失有种赔偿。苏东坡诗就说：“因病得闲殊不恶，安心是药更无方。”王丹麓《今世说》也记毛稚黄善病，人以为忧，毛曰：“病味亦佳，第不堪为躁热人道耳！”在着重体育的西洋，我们也可以找着同样达观的人。工愁善病的诺凡利斯（Novalis）在《碎金集》里建立一种病的哲学，说病是“教人学会休息的女教师”。罗登巴煦（Rodenbach）的诗集《禁锢的生活》（Les Vies Encloses）里有专咏病味的一卷，说病是“灵魂的洗涤（puration）”。身体结实、喜欢活动的人采用了这个观点，就对病痛也感到另有风味。顽健粗壮的十八世纪德国诗人白洛柯斯（B.H.Brockes)第一次害病，觉得是一个“可惊异的大发现(Eine bewanderungsurdige Erfindung)”。对于这种人，人生还有什么威胁？这种快乐，把忍受变为享受，是精神对于物质的大胜利。灵魂可以自主──同时也许是自欺。能一贯抱这种态度的人，当然是大哲学家，但是谁知道他不也是个大傻子？
是的，这有点矛盾。矛盾是智慧的代价。这是人生对于人生观开的玩笑。
祝你新年快乐！