1917年，克利福德（Clifford）奉父亲之命，从战场前线请假回家与康妮结婚，匆匆度完蜜月又返回部队。不久他受伤，虽然保住性命，但腰部以下终身瘫痪了，只能坐在轮椅上生活。聪明活泼、精力充沛的康妮尽心照顾丧失生活能力和性功能的丈夫，协助他写小说。死气沉沉的生活让她备受煎熬。
劳伦斯用自然界中的各种植物来影射夫妻关系微妙的变化。
小说第七章，康妮雇了博尔顿太太来看护丈夫。博尔顿太太是个好帮手，“然而，克利福德在自己内心深处从未原谅康妮，因为她把对他的贴身护理交给了一个陌生的雇佣来的妇人。他对自己说，这杀死了他和她之间亲密关系的真正花朵。但是康妮并不介意。他们亲密的美丽花朵对她来说就像兰花一样，鳞茎寄生在她的生命之树上，在她的眼中，开出了一种十分粗陋的花朵。
现在她有了更多属于自己的时间，可以在自己的房间里轻柔地弹着钢琴，然后唱：‘不要触摸荨麻，因为爱之束缚很难解开。’直到最近，她才意识到有多么难解开，这爱之束缚。但是，感谢上苍，她终于把它们解开了！她很高兴能独自一人，而不必总是和他说话。当他独自一人时，他打-打-打着打字机，无穷无尽地打着。但是当他不‘工作’，而她又在他身边时，他说话，总是说话，无穷细致地分析人和动机、结果、性格和个性，现在她已经受够了。多年来，她曾经爱着这样的谈话，直到她受够了，突然地，这些多到她不能忍受了。她很感恩，终于能够一个人呆着。
他俩的意识中，好像生着成千上万细微的根块和小丝线，纠结成一个乱团，直至再也挤不下了，而整个植物快要死了。现在，悄悄地，微妙地，她解开了他俩意识之间的纠结，一条一条地，又耐心又着急地轻斩乱丝，使自己脱离出来。尽管博尔顿太太的到来是个很大的帮助，但是，这种爱的束缚比大多数束缚更不容易解开。 ”
（Clifford, however, inside himself, never quite forgave Connie for giving up her personal care of him to a strange hired woman. It killed, he said to himself, the real flower of the intimacy between him and her. But Connie didn't mind that. The fine flower of their intimacy was to her rather like an orchid, a bulb stuck parasitic on her tree of life, and producing, to her eyes, a rather shabby flower.
Now she had more time to herself she could softly play the piano, up in her room, and sing: 'Touch not the nettle, for the bonds of love are ill to loose.' She had not realized till lately how ill to loose they were, these bonds of love. But thank Heaven she had loosened them! She was so glad to be alone, not always to have to talk to him. When he was alone he tapped-tapped-tapped on a typewriter, to infinity. But when he was not 'working', and she was there, he talked, always talked; infinite small analysis of people and motives, and results, characters and personalities, till now she had had enough. For years she had loved it, until she had enough, and then suddenly it was too much. She was thankful to be alone.
It was as if thousands and thousands of little roots and threads of consciousness in him and her had grown together into a tangled mass, till they could crowd no more, and the plant was dying. Now quietly, subtly, she was unravelling the tangle of his consciousness and hers, breaking the threads gently, one by one, with patience and impatience to get clear. But the bonds of such love are more ill to loose even than most bonds; though Mrs Bolton's coming had been a great help.）
以上的描写中，查泰莱夫妇对夫妻之间的亲密关系有着不同的理解。丈夫认为那是“真正花朵”，而妻子却视为寄生在大树上的粗鄙兰花。她甚至觉得，爱的束缚好比纠结成乱团的小根块，再也没有生长的空间，而且将要导致整个植物的死亡。尽管如此，爱的束缚很难解开，轻轻一碰，就如同触碰到荨麻，蜂蛰般疼痛难忍。
（荨麻）
可是，如果仅仅用无性婚姻来解释查泰莱夫人的外遇，未免有些肤浅。他俩的三观太不一致了，即使克利福德没有发生不幸的意外，两人的婚姻也是注定龃龉不断的。查泰莱夫妇生活在肮脏的工业文明与田园牧歌的老英国的交界地带，克利福德继承了父亲的产业和爵位，他代表着冰冷的现代工业文明以及被现代文明异化扭曲的自然本性。而康妮却是渴望回归自然的有血有肉的女性。小说第八章，作者通过与花草有关的细节来渲染夫妻之间的认知冲突。现举出以下几个例子：
第八章后半节，康妮从守林人的小屋后采了一些水仙花，然后回到家中。克利福德问她去哪儿。她答：“一直穿到了林子里！瞧，这些小小的水仙花不是很可爱吗？想一想，它们是从泥土中出来的！”（"Right across the wood! Look, aren't the little daffodils adorable? To think they should come out of the earth!"）
克利福德说：“也是从空气和阳光里出来的。”（"Just as much out of air and sunshine,”）
康妮立刻反驳道：“却是在泥土中塑成的。”她有点惊讶自己能反驳得这么快。（"But modelled in the earth," she retorted, with a prompt contradiction, that surprised her a little.）
第二天下午，她又去了树林，终于在小屋里见到了守林人梅勒斯，两人之间的第一次交谈并不那么愉快。她回到家中，发现丈夫正等着她泡下午茶。“她把保温套套在茶壶上，然后站起身来为她的紫香堇找一个小玻璃杯。那些可怜的花，在茎上低垂着。”（She put the tea-cosy over the tea-pot, and rose to get a little glass for her violets. The poor flowers hung over, limp on their stalks.）
“它们会活过来的。”她说，把杯子里的花端到他的面前让他闻。（"They'll revive again!" she said, putting them before him in their glass for him to smell.）
在这里，劳伦斯用低垂的花暗示克利福德丧失了性功能，因此他们的婚姻关系是有缺陷的，可是康妮还抱着一丝修复的幻想。
（紫香堇）
接着，克利福德引用了莎士比亚《冬天的童话》中的一句话：“比朱诺的眼睑还要甜美。”（Sweeter than the lids of Juno's eyes）
“我不觉得这句诗与这些真实的紫香堇有任何关联。” 她说， “伊丽莎白时代的人颇为矫情。”（"I don't see a bit of connection with the actual violets," she said. "The Elizabethans are rather upholstered."）
好天气持续着，连坐在轮椅上的克利福德都打算去林子里，康妮陪着他一起去。“在榛树矮林里，悬着淡金色的柔荑花絮，在阳光充足的地方，林地银莲花盛开，仿佛因生命的喜悦而惊呼，正如往日人们可以和它们一起惊呼一样。 它们散发着淡淡的苹果香。 康妮为克利福德采了一些。
他接住这些花，好奇地看着。 ”
（In the hazel copse catkins were hanging pale gold, and in sunny places the wood-anemones were wide open, as if exclaiming with the joy of life, just as good as in past days, when people could exclaim along with them. They had a faint scent of apple-blossom. Connie gathered a few for Clifford.
He took them and looked at them curiously.）
（榛树的柔荑花）
（林地银莲花）
接着，克利福德引用了约翰·济慈（John Keats）的《希腊古瓮颂》 (Ode on a Grecian Urn) 的第一行诗句来形容银莲花：“汝似未被奸污的娴静新娘 ”（Thou still unravished bride of quietness），并认为“这句诗用在花上比用在希腊花瓶上更适合。”（It seems to fit flowers so much better than Greek vases."）
他的引经据典引起了康妮的强烈反弹，下面几段文字很精彩，翻译如下：
“‘奸污这个字真是太可怕了！”她说：“只有人类才奸污事物。’（"Ravished is such a horrid word!" she said. "It's only people who ravish things."）
‘哦，我不知道……蜗牛和其他东西，’他说。
‘即使蜗牛也只是啃噬它们，而蜜蜂不会奸污。’
她生起他的气来，他把一切都变成了空虚的字眼。 紫香堇是朱诺的眼睑，风花是未被奸污的新娘。 她多么讨厌这些空虚的字眼，总是介于她和生活之间：他们就是奸污者，这些现成的单词和短语，吮吸了一切有生命的东西的精华。
与克利福德的散步并不十分成功。 在他和康妮之间，存在着一种紧张关系，每个人都假装没有注意到，但是这种状态确实摆在那儿。 突然间，她以女性的全部本能将他推开。 她想从他那里摆脱出来，尤其是他的意识，他的空虚的字眼，他的自我迷恋，无尽的单调的自我迷恋，以及他本人的空虚的言语。 ”
（"Oh, I don't know. . .snails and things," he said.
"Even snails only eat them, and bees don't ravish."
She was angry with him, turning everything into words. Violets were Juno's eyelids, and windflowers were on ravished brides. How she hated words, always coming between her and life: they did the ravishing, if anything did: ready-made words and phrases, sucking all the life-sap out of living things.）
The walk with Clifford was not quite a success. Between him and Connie there was a tension that each pretended not to notice, but there it was. Suddenly, with all the force of her female instinct, she was shoving him off. She wanted to be clear of him, and especially of his consciousness, his words, his obsession with himself, his endless treadmill obsession with himself, and his own words.）
一两天后，康妮在雨中外出，来到了守林人的小木屋。木屋锁着，里面空无一人。她坐在粗陋的门檐下的由原木制成的门槛上，看着雨，听着雨声，注意到“古老的橡树环立着，灰色有力的树干被雨湿成了黑色，圆圆的，充满了生命力，向四周甩着狂放的四肢。地面上完全没有杂草，银莲花到处都是，有一两株接骨木，或是雪球荚蒾，和一团缠结的紫色的黑莓灌木。在银莲花的绿色裙摆下，老的红棕色的蕨菜几乎消失了。或许这就是未被奸污的地方之一，未被奸污！而全世界都被奸污了。”
（Old oak-trees stood around, grey, powerful trunks, rain-blackened, round and vital, throwing off reckless limbs. The ground was fairly free of undergrowth, the anemones sprinkled, there was a bush or two, elder, or guelder-rose, and a purplish tangle of bramble: the old russet of bracken almost vanished under green anemone ruffs. Perhaps this was one of the unravished places.
Unravished! The whole world was ravished.）
（接骨木）
（雪球荚迷）
劳伦斯显然在现实生活中注意到了现代工业文明对自然环境的破坏，通过康妮的心理活动，把以克利福德为代表的那些资本家的糟蹋环境的行径视为“奸污”。资本家们平日里说着标准英语，动辄引经据典，却缺乏温情与怜悯，话语里充满了冷酷。生长着银莲花的这片山林，应该是回归本性的最好去处，在他们的嘴里，却是“未被奸污过的”地方。
康妮愤怒地想：“某种东西是不能被奸污的。你不能奸污一罐沙丁鱼。许多女子就像罐子里的沙丁鱼一样，男人也如此。但是，这地球…!”（Some things can't be ravished. You can't ravish a tin of sardines. And so many women are like that; and men. But the earth. . .!）
“雨变小了，橡树之间没有那么暗了。康妮想离开，却仍旧坐在那儿。她感觉冷了，但内心的憎恨而产生的不可抗拒的惯性压着她，使她像麻痹似的呆在那儿。
被奸污！一个都没被触摸过的人怎可遭奸污。被死气沉沉的字眼奸污过的变成了淫秽，被死气沉沉的观念奸污过的变成了困扰。”
（The rain was abating. It was hardly making darkness among the oaks any more. Connie wanted to go; yet she sat on. But she was getting cold; yet the overwhelming inertia of her inner resentment kept her there as if paralysed.
Ravished! How ravished one could be without ever being touched. Ravished by dead words become obscene, and dead ideas become obsessions.）
正当她胡思乱想时，梅勒斯出现了。尽管梅勒斯受过良好的教育，会说标准英语，却坚持讲方言，也许方言才是最纯朴最自然的情感流露。深居树林里的他远离现代文明带来的喧嚣，过着返璞归真的生活，在他的原始激情感召下，康妮最终完成了蜕变，挥剑斩断非正常婚姻和残酷的工业文明强加于她的种种桎梏。
