Normally I think I am quite a prudent and calm person, but recently I got a bit antsy. “Why?” people may ask, “Everything has been going your way.” Actually, That IS the problem. Because I am doing all right , My chance to get marred to a Chinese MM is becoming slim to none.
The other day a friend of mine emailed me a article with a title “ 结婚名单上必须枪毙的 5 类 男人” referring the attachment below. To summarize the essence of the article , A MM won’t marry A GG if he meets the test of any of the following conditions.
a) Homebound
b) tall
c) Fashion oriented
d) Wealthy
e) Good looking
I have to admit I am completed shocked by this revelation, in my mind the above conditions have been golden rules for MMs to pick their men for years when it comes marriage. Can you believe this? Now if a GG who goes out every night, is short in length, has enough money in his pocket for next meal, dress sloppyly, and has a featureless face, then he would be in hot demand. MMs would go craze on him since he would be the best marriage material.
I thought and thinking, in the end I couldn’t still figure out a logical explanation. What has happened in my motherland, where are these brainy, talented and beautiful MMs in my dreams? I have no clue at all. Maybe China has changed so much so fast and it has left many of us in dust. The only reason I could only think of is that something must in the water these MM drink or air they breathe.
In terms my and many GGs’ outlooks for marriage I think it would be very gloomy. To tell the truth, we are just a bunch of “dead men” walking. The worst thing is there are no remedies for us. Because it is too late for us to go back to our mothers womb to reshape our physical attributes, besides we have to dress up to make a living and amass some money to live (FYI, the average condo sales price in Manhattan is $1.45 million. ). Now you see what I mean.
As any reasonable man who still wants get married I started to weigh other options which may be available for me. Nevertheless, before I am going to “jump off the ship” I summoned all my courages to make a final appeal to Chinese MMs out there “ Before you pull the trigger could you think twice? “.
Note: Someone indicated to me that my writing is too serious. So that I’d just like to poke some fun to light up a little. However, If my writing offends you please forgive me. Thx.
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结婚名单上必须枪毙的 5类男人 (zt)
1.长得太帅
男人除非打定主意吃软饭,否则长得太漂亮绝对是缺点。这个男人长张漂亮脸蛋,从小被阿姨们抢着抱,长大被身边女生追,婚前倒贴的妹妹一大把,婚后虎视眈眈的姐姐一大群,把他捧得不知天高地厚。这种漂亮男人,摆在街上供我意淫挺好,真把他请进家里供着?才怪!
2.挣钱太多
男人的钱,够稳定生活就好了。钱太多烧手,往往会生外心。当他的钱可以应付不止一个女人的首饰需要,就算他不主动,也有其他女人以所谓爱情的名义自动送上门来。做人不要太贪。控制不住的那部分,很有可能肥水流到外人田,令你日后成为怨妇队伍里的一名。
3.服装品味太好
男人服装穿得干净整洁就好,太讲究服装的男人,往往太爱自己,婚姻生活里不懂得适当的让步。想一个男人,他的衣服比我的还多,每月制装费比我还高,每天早晨出门前,考虑是穿蓝色这套好,还是黑色那套好,是配灰色领带,还是配棕色鞋子,多么娘娘腔!
4.个子太高
中国女性曾经侮辱性地提出了三级残废一说,大伤个子不高的男人的自尊,大长了那些傻高个儿的志气。想要个子高的男人,最好看看你自己有多高。莎菲女士碰见的那位小白脸,高得她仅到他腋下,这样子高法,有什么好?一辈子那么长,天天需仰视才得见,脖子吃不消不说,大多时间只能看到他下半截。要是光为了男人的下半身,哪有结婚必要?
5.守在家里
男人晚上不出去,肯守在家里,应该算美德吧?曾经去一个朋友家玩,住了三天,吃尽了苦。那男人外表看斯文温和,抢起电视遥控器来可是寸土必争从不手软。我要看麦当娜,他要看警察现场抓罪犯。我们每天最佳娱乐就是抢遥控器,因对方身强力壮,每次以我的失败告终。看着他宽厚的肩膀,我心里对自己咬牙切齿地说:“绝不嫁这男人!”
第一条,外表。从心理学的角度讲,男人帅会呈现两个极端,一种是骄奢淫逸型,一种是谨慎内向型。女人是感情的俘虏,比男人更容易去怀疑和否定。男人帅的同时,也会让身边的女子益发不自信,然后产生不安全感。不过,只由外貌来评断一个人,还是草率了。我认识几个男孩子人都很帅,虽然有些优越感,但是也没有掩盖他们的善良和正直。
第二条,富有。 我觉得要看钱的来源。国内改革开放以后暴富一大批人,部分是钻了空子。现在国内非常富有的人,也大多比较有后台。我只能说,这些有钱人的素质,并没有想象中的高。所以,国内流行的那句话,“男人有钱就变坏”,我觉得很大成分上是针对国内好事不出门坏事传千里的环境。对于比较明智的人来说,钱不会害了一个人。
第三条,题为“服装品位太好”。可是这一段描写,绝对不是服装品位太好,而是没有品位。如果品位太好,一眼就知道什么适合自己,不会挑来挑去搞不清楚的。
第四条,个子高。我记得一篇文章,讨论男人和女人的身高差别,据说是15厘米最好。列举了很多的优点,那位作者可以和这个理论一下。
第五条,居家型男人。居家型不等于自闭型。两人相处总会有这样那样的摩擦。如果男人一天到晚在外面很少回家和自己抢电视的话,那么心中会不会出现其他的抱怨?想起一句话,“忽见枝头杨柳色,悔叫夫婿觅封侯”。
前些天看到一篇报道,日本女性的择偶标准由“三高”转向“三低”,不再是高学历高收入高个子,而是低姿态、低风险、低束缚。(注释:“低姿态”是指懂得尊重女性,了解女性需求和想法的男性,像美容师、社会工作者等都被认为懂得女性心理。此外,没有年龄偏见的男性也大受欢迎,姐弟恋的情形比以前多,有国际观的男性或有「女士优先」观念的外国男性也颇受欢迎。「低风险」指的是低失业率的工作,像公务员、拥有专业资格执照的人。固然高收入人人称羡,但是相对的风险也高,日本长期的不景气也造成许多人中年失业,单身女性可能因此觉得细水长流的稳定收入还比较实在。「低束缚」即不互相束缚,尊重彼此的生活隐私和活动空间,婚后仍然可以发挥自己的所学和专长。低束缚的想法也开始出现在建筑设计上,现在日本很多室内设计师在设计时,还会考虑配合男女需求不同,提供夫妻各自的活动空间。)
我想,这五条从字面理解和这个三低标准有些相似,但是只是表面相似,内涵迥异。
妇女解放运动以来,女人在各个方面争取着平等的待遇。可是从心理上说,对于婚姻中的安全感的需求,至少是东方人来说,还是没有改变。从高到低的走向,也只能说明女人不得不在这个疲惫浮躁的社会,放低了标准,以换取着安全感。
如果具备这5条的男人一样可以给予安全感,女人何乐而不为呢?