do i have just accepted it?
(2009-05-14 15:05:32)
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i guess most people view me as a pretty successful business woman.. and i am, just relatively speaking. what contributes to my modest success is the fact that i always uses common sense. in business, you deal with people, no matter your boss, your peer or your subordinate, or your opponants, and you want to figure out that what matters most to them.. thinking in their shoes. yet, recently i realized that the new generation is forming that i have been becoming more and more the senior at the dinner table. i also have forseen the future for myself that the glass ceiling has already reached me. i would have to figure out a brilliant idea to become an enterprenuer to avoid being a corp citizen at mid 40s. i think a mid 40s woman still working as a work bee is too pathetic. i long for being someone that has a strong man financially speaking to back me up, as successful as i have been so far.. i realize that one day in about 10 years, it would be my time to leave the work force.. so then what, what do i do to make a living if i still have to be financially independent.. i have a loving husband and really nice that i don't have too much to complain.. yet he seems to be too comfortably believing that i can keep up with the competition and money won't be an issue for us... mentally i am tired.. how many times as i walk on the street of NYC, seeming people walking by so expressionlessly, of course, everyone is striving for a living, that i realize that i was just a helpless work woman that one of these days i will be exiting without too many people missing me.. i would love to work on things for fun, enjoying being with my girl, going to school with her.... work on water painting as i always love to, reading.. driving to a place just for the sake to be away from the crowd.. going back to my hometown to surprise my parents one of these days, then take them out to shop or have some tea time... visiting a good friend just at the least time she expects... .....................too much to miss for the tedious work i am doing...