关于意义的追忆（5）

想到了美国诗人Robert Frost 那首The Road Not Taken:

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood

and sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveller, long I stood

and looked down one as far as I could

to where it bent in the undergrowth;

 

Then took the other, as just as fair,

and having perhaps the better claim

because it was grassy and wanted wear;

though as for that, the passing there

had worn them really about the same,

 

And both that morning equally lay

in leaves no feet had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

 

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I --

I took the one less travelled by,

and that has made all the difference

 

这首诗在Frost的作品中最著名，该是由于大家在他们的每个十字路口面前都有过的那种复杂感情。至少在我这里是如此：现在明白了在从前的每个十字路口前的幼稚，我便与这诗有了共鸣。人的一生说短也短，说长也长，有数不清的大大小小的岔路和难关 – 往后看是这样，往前看也是这样。但是，知道了”way leads on to way” 的道理，就从现在做起，做好每一个选择吧。

时间在我这里再次展现她的大力。我知道了我是个看重和解的人。我反对社会中的暴力革命、也反对自己内心的暴力革命。所以，我的决定是做了个十五度的转弯 - 不是一百八十度。职业跟很多东西一样，相处的时间长了，也就有了感情，尽管还不是感动。但我的职业不再完全遮蔽我的视野。我把职业看成我在这个世界上生存该纳的税。交了税，我就实现了与世界的和解，我就可以无忧无虑地享受我的自由、做我热爱的事。

虎妈说：”多数人做他们热爱的事都做得很臭  (most people stink at the things they love).”虎妈的观察至少部分准确。我对此的解释是：在现实生活中没有多少人能以他热爱的、感动他的事为职业。他们无法投入他们的全部生命，当然会做得很臭。我就觉得我总把自己热爱的事做得很臭。但是，如果是臭味相投、乐此不疲、偶有会意便欣然忘食，我就实现了我的意义。这对我也就够了吧。