Canadian Environmentalism

A rabbit fished the whole day and hooked nothing. She fished another day with no luck. When she swung the hook into the river the third day, a big fish jumped into the air and yelled to her: How dare you bait us every day with a carrot?   

We always make fun of rabbits and they can never harm us, or do they?  In 1950, the Australian government spread a lethal virus to infect the rabbit population. It's so lethal that the death rate of infected rabbits was 99.9% and 5 million rabbits were killed. Think about what humane society has to say about this mass destructive biological weapon against such do-human-no-harm rabbits. Ironically, rabbit is the main environmental problem in Australia. Even with this dramatically reduced population of rabbits, it still threaten 157 species in 2007, endangering 17 bird species, 13 mammal species, 4 reptile species, 1 fish species, 1 insect species, and 121 plant species. Read a rabbit cartoon story to kindergarten children, and try to explain to them how such an innocent rabbit could be such an environmental monster.    

The reason why rabbit is such an environmental killer is that when Europeans introduced them into the new continent, there was virtually no natural enemy in Australia.   One species grows without constraints and eventually tips off the balance of the ecosystem. What lesson we can learn from this? Think hard which species has virtually no natural enemy on our Earth and potentially endangers our environment? It's the human! The Homo Sapient! Only one species has no natural enemies in the ecosystem. Could you imagine a troop of tigers fighting humans armed with atomic bombs?    

 We are the environments of ourselves. You are my environment and I am yours. Humans are the key to environmental disasters themselves. I do not protest the pipeline built between Canada and America. I do not protest the fossil fuels through the pipeline. What I protest is the direction of the flow in the pipe. That's Canadian environmentalism. If humans are an environment for each other, I would rather America be the environment of Canada than Canada be America's. 

Canada is the only country that has Green Party, and Canadian environmentalism's slogan is “Go Green”.   

What's green energy? Is solar panel green? No! It's brown, and its efficiency on capture solar energy is far lower than green leaves. Is the wing turbine green? No! It's not only not green but also endangers our Canadian Gees. The only green energy is fossil fuels. Because fossil fuels create the Green House Effect! Since when greenhouse effect become a derogatory term? The greenhouse is an important technique in agriculture. Green House Effect of the Earth is indispensable for all lives on this planet.  Green House. Green. Carbon dioxides are the key indispensable nutrition for all green plants.  Without Carbon Dioxide in our atmosphere, there will be no green environment. Let's burn all the fossil fuels we can get underground, so we can turn all the geological carbon into biological carbon! We should unearth all possible carbon into our ecosystem. That's green! 

Yap, the climate will get warmer, that's why it is called Green House Effect. But should we Canadian worry about it? We have too long of winter, we should hail for global warming. Let the world get warmer, and more humid, then we can not only preserve the rainforest in Amazon valley but also let the rainforest expand into Mississippi Valley and all the way up to our Southern border. Let the Arctic ice melts without a trace, and the sea level rises and the Mississippi River becomes the Mississippi Sea. When the atmosphere gets warmer, we Canadians save energy for winter heating and save money for clumsy clothes, and the size of the population on the two sides of our South border flip, Canada has 300 million and America 30 million.  The world will trade through the Arctic Ocean without using Panama Canal or Suez Canal. If world trade needs a canal, it should be from the Mississippi Sea to Hudson Bay. The world civilization then shifts from the Atlantic Ocean to the Arctic Ocean and Canada will become a hegemony superpower. The next century should become the Canadian century. “The True North strong and free!” just as O Canada wished for.    

In Canadian Environmentalism's ideal, Yellowknife should become our capital, and tourists from all over the world should flood into beaches of the Arctic Ocean in Yukon and Northwest Territory. Then you hear nothing when people talk in Florida, as every sentence out of the mouth will evaporate immediately. If you still have the nostalgia of vocal communication in Florida, join the Toastmasters club in Miami by paying 100 dollars monthly fee, as they have to set up their meeting in a huge refrigerator.