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读Jordan Peterson的《超越秩序:人生新十二法则》

(2022-12-04 12:01:33) 下一个

周六刮风下雨,懒得出门,正好在家读完了Jordan Peterson的书《Beyond Order: 12 More Rules for Life》,感觉也挺充盈的。

Jordan Peterson被称为是当代最有影响力的加拿大畅销书作者和热门网络媒体人,我个人认为这种称号大大低估了他在学术思想领域的贡献和影响力。

Peterson是一位有着几十年临床经验的心理医生,先后在哈佛大学和多伦多大学任教。他的书在世界各地发行500多万册,他在全球各大城市举办了几百场的公开巡讲,观众多达250万人。除此之外,他还发表过100多篇学术论文。他在1999年所著的《Maps of Meaning》彻底改变了传统的宗教心理学,被加拿大安省电视台TVO制作成了13集的电视系列讲座。感兴趣的朋友可以在YouTube上观看。

但Peterson本人对热门网络媒体人的称号似乎并不在意,不但不在意,甚至还很享受利用网络媒体来推广自己的理论。他积极参加各种网络媒体的访谈节目,并且在YouTube和Podcasts都开设了自己的频道,吸引了来自世界各地的上亿网友的关注。这可能也正是他广受年青人追捧的原因。

他之前的畅销书《12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos》, 我也读了。正是因为读了那一本,才让我又迫不及待地买了这第二本。

读Jordan Peterson的书,我主要有这么几点感触:

第一是惊讶于他在哲学,心理学,宗教,历史,政治,文化领域的广博知识和极其丰富的词汇量和表达能力。

见过一些作家书写得很好,可是接受现场采访时嘴完全跟不上大脑,显得笨拙,词不达意。Peterson却不同,他的现场表现和他的书面表达能力都同样的滔滔不绝,一泻千里,引经据典,词汇丰富得惊人。

YouTube上有很多各大媒体采访他的视频,其中广为流传的一段是他四年前接受BBC主持人Cathy Newman的辩论,非常精彩,把这位一向言语犀利的新闻界一姐搞得竟然无言以对。

也许是心里蕴藏了太多想要表达的东西,Peterson说话语速快,嗓音有点嘶哑,有时听着替他感到辛苦,尤其是近两年的疾病缠身让他看起来有些疲惫。

他的书由于词汇量很大,涉及到的背景知识,如宗教,哲学,历史很多,所以读起来也会让人感到吃力。诚实地讲,读完一遍,我感到自己能理解百分之八十就不错了。将来有时间再回去慢慢重读,应该会有更多的领悟和收获。

第二是佩服Peterson的能量和敬业精神。

刚读完的这本《Beyond Order》是他近几年辗转于不同城市的各大医院之间完成的。这期间他亲历了心爱女儿的病痛和手术,妻子被诊断为癌症晚期接受治疗并挺过难关,他自己由于工作压力依赖药物不当而生命垂危,险些丧命,最后辗转到莫斯科接受俄罗斯医生的治疗才终于从生命线上被抢救回来。

买这本书的时候我还有些怀疑他经历着这么多的健康困扰,是否还能达到象上一本书一样的质量。出乎意料的是这本书比上一本书更加的有深度,也许正是这些艰难的生命体验让作者有了更多的思考和体会。

在这本书里Peterson提到有时候觉得生命很艰难,可接触到自己的病人讲述他们的人生经历,才发现跟他们相比,自己的这点事根本不算什么。而他们又常常会讲述他们曾经认识的其他朋友比他们的经历还要惨痛很多。这是一个很有趣的发现。

第三是欣赏Peterson对家庭的责任和爱。

他常常在节目中提到他的妻子和孩子,他的巡回演讲也总是让妻子为他做开场白,他还常常和女儿妻子一起做YouTube节目。

《Beyond Order》最后一章他谈到勇气和爱,其中关于如何面临亲人离世的分析和描述让亲历了母亲离世的我非常有共鸣。

“I am not feeling the way I am supposed to feel. I am not crying. I am not overwhelmed by sorrow. I am going far too normally about my day-to-day business (something particularly likely to occur if you receive the news of a death from a distant locale)”.

这正是母亲去世后这几年我一直在搜寻的答案。想起母亲病逝的那一夜,我一个人从多伦多连夜坐飞机,搭车,辗转20多个小时终于赶到家。站在母亲的遗像前,我竟然没有哭,似乎也感觉不到太多的悲哀,正象Peterson描述的那样,甚至参加母亲的葬礼我都没有怎么掉眼泪。接下来的一星期,我陪父亲聊天散心,也没有落泪。很奇怪的一种感觉,我都有点自责。

”But then, as you engage in something trivial, as if things are normal, the grief will strike you like a rogue wave. That happens repeatedly, God only knows for how long. It is something that arises from the depths, and it takes you irresistibly in its grasp.”

可回来生活工作正常继续了一段时间之后,那种悲哀会突然在某一个时刻象洪水猛兽般袭来,比如一个人洗碗的时候,一个人洗澡的时候,我会突然泪如雨下,泣不成声。完全是Peterson在书中描述的那样。

Peterson还提到对老人和孩子的爱,也让我有很多共同的感受。人老了,性格的很多毛病会越来越突出,但是所有那些性格特点,脆弱和局限都是他们身上的重要组成部分,值得我们去爱,象我们对孩子无微不至的爱一样。

“It is necessary to understand that, just as in the case of children, all those particularities, fragilities, and limitations are part and parcel of what it is that you come to love.”

第四,也是最重要的,我非常佩服Peterson的真实,他的深度思考和敢于直言的勇气。

Peterson认为这个世界由混乱 (chaos) 和秩序 (order) 两方面组成,如中国道家文化里的阴和阳。而每个人的内心也都有善和恶两方面。正是因为这样,我们应该去听取和我们性格不同的人的意见,才能够扬长避短。

“It is difficult for any of us to see what we are blinded to by the nature of our personalities. It is for this reason that we must continually listen to people who differ from us, and who, because of that difference, have the ability to see and to react appropriately to what we cannot detect.”

由个人行为Peterson又升华到民主制度的设立,在一个民主社会里,我们定期地更换不同思想观点的人做领袖,也是这个道理。

“We manage that partly in democratic systems by throwing out the people in charge on a regular basis, and replacing them with their ideological opposites.”

在这本书里,Peterson还专门有一条法则告诉大家要摈弃所谓的“主义”。

“The communists produced a worldview that was attractive to fair-minded people, as well as those who were envious and cruel.” “Unfortunately for the communists, a substantial proportion of the oppressed were incapable, unconscientious, unintelligent, licentious, power mad, violent, resentful, and jealous, while a substantial proportion of the oppressors were educated, able, creative, intelligent, honest, and caring.”

他年青的时候曾经也去尝试追随过当时流行的社会主义意识形态,后来经过对苏联,对中国很多现象的观察,分析和思考,他有了很清楚的认识。在他的前一本人生法则书里对communists也有很精彩的分析。

Peterson的有些思想在今天强调政治正确的西方社会是很有争议的,比如他被认为大男子主义,过多强调男人要男性化。他反对政府规定使用专门的代词来形容同性恋也遭到了很多人的攻击,甚至差点惹上官司。

不过,Peterson还是一直坚持人要勇敢地寻找真理,直面挑战。

“If you confront the suffering and malevolence, and if you do that truthfully and courageously, you are stronger, your family is stronger, and the world is a better place.”

总之,我认为Jordan Peterson是当今世界很难得的一位思想者,他鼓励大家要”being truthful, responsible, grateful, and humble” 诚实,负责,感恩,谦逊,他自己也确实做到了。

在他两本书里提出的24条人生法则,看起来都非常简单通俗,可他对于每一条法则的注解却包含了很多的历史,宗教和哲学的思考,非常值得一读。

12 More Rules for Life

  1. Do not carelessly denigrate social institutions or creative achievement.
  2. Imagine who you could be and then aim single-mindedly at that.
  3. Do not hide unwanted things in the fog.
  4. Notice that opportunity lurks where responsibility has been abdicated.
  5. Do not do what you hate.
  6. Abandon ideology.
  7. Work as hard as you possibly can on at least one thing and see what happens.
  8. Try to make one room in your home as beautiful as possible.
  9. If old memories still upset you, write them down carefully and completely.
  10. Plan and work diligently to maintain the romance in your relationship.
  11. Do not allow yourself to become resentful, deceitful, or arrogant.
  12. Be grateful in spite of your suffering.

12 Rules for Life

  1. Stand up straight with your shoulders back.
  2. Treat yourself like you are someone you are responsible for helping.
  3. Make friends with people who want the best for you.
  4. Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today.
  5. Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them.
  6. Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world.
  7. Pursue what is meaningful (not what is expedient).
  8. Tell the truth – or, at least, don't lie.
  9. Assume that the person you are listening to might know something you don't.
  10. Be precise in your speech.
  11. Do not bother children while they are skateboarding.
  12. Pet a cat when you encounter one in the street.
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