译者:花雨101
情感虐待的目的是剥夺你的自我价值感和独立感。如果你是情感虐待的受害者,你会觉得自己离不开这段婚姻或是两性关系,离开你的施虐者你将一无所有。
情感虐待包括语言虐待比如大喊大叫、辱骂、责备、羞辱,还包括孤立、恐吓和控制行为等。另外,感情和心理虐待的施虐者还经常会威胁说如果你不按他们的意愿做的话,你可能要遭受肢体虐待或其他不良后果。
你可能觉得肢体虐待要远比情感虐待后果严重,因为前者可能把你送入医院并留下伤疤。但是,情感虐待的伤疤也一样真实而且深切,可以说情感虐待和肢体虐待一样具有伤害性而且后果可能更严重。
经济或财务虐待是一种比较隐蔽的情感虐待。记住:施虐者的目的是控制你,他或她会经常用钱来达到目的。经济或财务虐待包括:硬性控制你的财务;隐藏现金或信用卡;强迫你计算你花的每一分钱;控制生活必需品(食物,衣物,药物,住房);限制你的零花钱;阻止你工作或选择职业;干扰你的工作(强迫你误工,频繁打电话等);暗偷或明拿你的钱。
The aim of emotional abuse is to chip away at your feelings of self-worth and independence. If you’re the victim of emotional abuse, you may feel that there is no way out of the relationship or that without your abusive partner you have nothing. Emotional abuse includes verbal abuse such as yelling, name-calling, blaming, and shaming. Isolation, intimidation, and controlling behavior also fall under emotional abuse. Additionally, abusers who use emotional or psychological abuse often throw in threats of physical violence or other repercussions if you don’t do what they want. You may think that physical abuse is far worse than emotional abuse, since physical violence can send you to the hospital and leave you with scars. But, the scars of emotional abuse are very real, and they run deep. In fact, emotional abuse can be just as damaging as physical abuse—sometimes even more so. Economic or financial abuse: A subtle form of emotional abuse Remember, an abuser’s goal is to control you, and he or she will frequently use money to do so. Economic or financial abuse includes: Rigidly controlling your finances.
Withholding money or credit cards. Making you account for every penny you spend. Withholding basic necessities (food, clothes, medications, shelter). Restricting you to an allowance. Preventing you from working or choosing your own career. Sabotaging your job (making you miss work, calling constantly) Stealing from you or taking your money.
很多女性在恋爱或者婚姻内,自己都不曾料想到,所受的误解、监视、人身关系控制,都和精神虐待有关,她们可能还对此有另外的解释。研究中发现感情虐待对女性的影响是严重的,但最严重的是社会、舆论、当事人都并不当真,好像它远没有肉体虐待那么直观和暴虐,没有显见的瘀伤或者骨折。人们觉得感情虐待很难界定和举证。