Go wild

I married to a husband who loves the basic pleasure good food offers. That is except Alcohol.  He would be found under the table within 10 minutes of a glass of wine or a bottle of bear in the best scenario. No need to describe the worst scenario here. It is quite interesting fact considering that he came from a family who owned the most famous French restaurant in old China. His gradpa was a businessman loved western culture and had many foreign friends. He probably passed away too early to give my husband the real training. Since we are married, my husband got the chance to learn and practice but till today, he will tell the waiters or the friends, he can not drink but the wife can. Or can I?

 

I was not a drinker before 25. My parents were very strict on no alcohol or smoking in the house and very proud about it. Over 80% of male population in China do both. Also both are viewed necessary for conducting business just as the business suits and computers are needed in the daily business life.  My father had been doing business as the head of a large technical company for over 20 years in China.  I think he has the reason to be proud to be really successful in business without drinking or smoking. He would frown when my grandmother occasionally offered me the sweet rice wine decades ago. She noticed the frown and tried excuse the behavior as “it is just in holiday”. Honestly, it did not taste good. I was not a buyer.

 

My sister is probably the one tempered me first.  As the black sheep in the house, she never wanted to be just an obedient kid. I have no idea when she started drinking behind my parents back. It was when both of us have started life in US,  she acted in the evil voice describing the scene for me: you’re really tired after a day of hard work; it is the most relaxing to sip a glass of wine while sitting in a bubbled bath. Hmm…  I believe she practiced what she preached. I witnessed her pulling herself a glass of red wine before she started to prepare a meal. That was before she had a crying baby in her arm and the meal needs to be ready before 11pm.  

 

My sister’s advice is that I need it to loose up.  Really, why listen to the parents and follow the lined out path? What is wrong of going wild? Those were the questions of a Dallas gentleman who happened to sit next to me couple years ago in a trip to Europe. With all the free booze they offered at the business class, the 60 years old buttoned up engineer with a cold greeting when we sat down, turned into a chatty granny after 4 shots of Jack Daniels, particularly after I asked why drinking.  He shared his life with me. He told me his family, his work, his disease and treatment, and his future plans. He shared the learning of life with me. Go celebrate the life and enjoy alcohol, absolutely. I was awed by the power of alcohol to loosen him up.

 

In my daily life, I am probably as tight as the Dallas gentleman when he stepped on the flight. I had the embarrassing record of sitting in a bar with a group of co-workers whole night speaking only 3 or 4 sentences. What a freak, they must think. I was the one felt so insulted when the restaurant offered wine for lunch attending a business meeting in France; it is so unprofessional according to US standard. Never have I seen one over the top in my life when I was 25 years old by the way. I saw enough in movies and books. The drunken are dirty, filthy, silly, do evil things that they will regret when they wake up the next morning. And these people have no respect for themselves and can not be successful. That was the reason. That was why I resisted; I can not loose the self control and I can not show the weakness.  For long time, I tasted wine to fit in but had been always very guarded and stop way before I felt anything wrong.

 

When one walks along the river, there will be time to get wet. Or they say there will be first time of everything. My time of getting over the line certainly came no matter how cautious I wanted to be. The first time was while I went to a shopping mall with couple of friends. We had a dinner and I had two cocktails and a beer. Maybe because I was with close friends, I never thought about being guarded. And I was the driver to get everyone back to home after the dinner. I did not realize how much I was under the influence when I got into the car.  That was the longest 1.5 hours driving in my life. I felt my hands and feet were beyond my control; my head was in the cloud. The lights were very fussy. I did my best to stay in the two lines.  There were couple close calls. No one in the car said anything.  It was a miracle we all made home at the end. I swore I would never drink and drive again. Getting drunk was certainly not enjoyable as I always know.

 

The 2^nd time came soon enough when my husband and I went for a vacation in Florida. Without the kid around in that trip, I brought a bottle of champaign for the night back to the hotel. God it was so smooth. The whole bottle was down when my husband took a shower. I was leaning in the bed, feeling that I was flying in the sky and I could sing and I was absolutely happy. It was great and no one had any problem; my husband loved me being happy and less demanding finally.

 

The 3^rd time came easier at a big party at a friend’s house. No memory was left about how much red wine I had. I was funny, witty, happy, and became part of the conversation vs. a wallflower. I could still open the refrigerate and found myself some juice to fresh up when I noticed that I probably drunk too much. My body was about one second slower than my mind but I still had the control over it. I was very relaxed and I really enjoyed the feeling. Since then, I managed to reach again and again the totally free status without making myself a fool or embarrassing myself afterwards for my behaviors. Just once I felt I was over the limit and the hangover was terrible the next morning.

 

So I go to parties these days ready to be relaxed and go wild.  I go on business trips with the drinks to help me go sleep or party after mid night. I know I am still the control freak but I know better to enjoy the alcohol to loose me up. Champaign is absolutely my favorite, particularly those pink rosy ones. Sake is another favorite to get me to the top easily and so smooth to drink. Cosmopolitan is my signature cocktail to celebrate being a grown up woman. On the other hand, I am trying to avoid the parties that drinking is to get people under the table vs. enjoying the delicious fluid and the moment. I also grow too snobbish to drink with people who serve desert wines to all guests through the meal or who demand to heat up the best quality dry sakes I offer.

 

Before turning 40, I finally find my license to go wild with alcohol. No drunk and drive; no hangover. Just find the fun in life of being wild.