where r there so many sad stories

why are there so many sad stories?

L and I were sitting on the couch chatting around, then all of sudden she asked " do you remember R? the photographer on my marriage registery ceremony?"

 

"was that guy with smiles on his face all the time? with round face?"

"yeap, he got divorced"

"...... really?!!! I remember how you envied his happy family and what a perfect couple they were in your eyes!!! what's going on"

 

Both the husband and the wife were Ph.D students, the wife is brillient and excels in her own fields. When she graduated that year, it was hard for engineers to find a job so she took an opportunity in the States. They sent their kids back to China, so the family members were residing separately in three different countries. The story went on like most of cases in the reality show, the husband developed a extermarital relationship with the friend of his wife who was living in the same building. The wife flew back to Canada for saving their marriage, however, the marriage melt down eventually. Presently the husband and the wife finally managed to live in the same city with decent jobs, the family which they were fighting for collapsed. The woman whom the husband got involved in moved to another city for the job.

 

Both L and I remained silent for a long while, we were sad but could say nothing.

 

I believe there are various similar stories in this world. Sometimes we made plan and freqnetly for something that we believed necessary for our life we chose to sacrifice something else that we believe always there. When the plan was carried out, ironically the process led to the collapse of what we had planed to maintain. In this story, it's so easy to blame the husband. Maybe both of the husband and the wife had thought that their marriage was different from the others, and their marriage could resist powerful temptation. It is said that ppl don't betray, it is not because they can really resist the temptation, actually it is because the price of betray is too high or the temptation is not strong enough. In fact, in reality it is much more frequent to find that the price for betrayal is so low that we are losing confidence in trusting others.

 

In a solid and successful relationship, faith is the first element. It is way far much easier to start a relationship than to maintain it through all our lives. Before the knot is tied, we believe that marriage means success of a relationship, but we forget that marriage means only the beginning of another phase of the same relationship, the relationship could fall into apart without care from both sides. Here kicks in the responsibilities and faith in love. As a matter of fact, the responsibilities and faith are always critical in any relationship or in any stage of the relationship. Marriage certificate could not guarantee a successful relationship, nor does it ensure the happiness.   Life is a long long journey, we never know what we gonna face along the road. Sometimes we fall, then we have to struggle hard to stand up and move on. Sometimes we rush into one stage where we had thought we gonna gain security and happiness once we get in, we are so disparate that we forget to give us a minute to think of its real meaning. Sometimes we merely get tired, we believe it will definitely comforts the exhausting heart and soul once we select the roof, but later we might only find out it brings more endless troubles and start to regret.

 

Think carefully before take any action. Life is in our hands, we make our own choices then we build up our own destinies.

 

All the fairy tales end in “The Prince and Princess live happily ever after….”

 

In reality, so many stories disclose the tears, fights, hurts, betrayal, broken-hearts……

 

Mostly we seem to know everything when some ppl come to us for their problems, but ironically we lose all our rationalities when confronting our own issues. No matter how crappy the others are, it seems like you always meet the crappiest person in this world. How many confidence do we still honestly own after we hear and see so many lovers turning into enemies? Can we still count on some one in this world for the responsibilities?......

 

Could we still trust the beauty mind and soul after we watched so many dark sides of the human beings?

 

Honestly, I don’t know and am confused. The others are far beyond control, so you could only rely on yourself, that is, trust the others or grant the others your trust, but not rely on them, you are the only person who can rely on. Reliance could turn into burdens when the others are getting tired.  Seek more sources of happiness so that you may not rely on one single spot for your happiness.

Always do your best, and choose to devote yourself, embrace it and give it all you have when the time comes, so that you won’t regret or spend more time wondering so many “what if”s later on.

Meanwhile , never do something just for that thing. For instance, loving someone just because you are loved(not because you love as well), marry someone just for the purpose of getting married. Being lonely is not that bad, but it will turn into a disaster if you feel lonely while staying with someone.

Once you get it, Please appreciate with your full heart, because there are millions of people in this world and only you two have a chance to love each other, and every love is precious.

Never put it before any potential challenge or test, you will find out actually love is fragile and what it needs is to care not test.

In any case, treat people nicely and try not to hurt anyone on purpose no matter what excuse you may make.

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(stop here, because I am getting really headache…on the other hand, no single correct answer for this question as well……wish everyone best luck!)
July 03 2007