a kind of my own and enjoy when you can

29/1/09

Haven't written about anything smart for a while. Sometime it's this tendency that you get on an easy track and forget to intellegently chanllenge yourself to think.

 

Honey said I isolate myself from the land I stand on by limiting my friends to Chinese and writing and reading in merely Chinese; my family sees me as a changed person, a foreigner who forgets the root. Nothing I believe in or approve of is in line with their expectation; the dream land in my heart isn't a dream anymore, a joke that would have made me laugh my head off in the past isn't funny anymore, a friend who I could spend day and night talking to a few years ago isn't inspiring anymore. It turns out I'm changing to a kind of my own, nurturing my own needs and not grouping to any alikes.

 

Well, it's just who I am, no Aussie with big nose and Aussie accent, no traditional Chinese who lives in one city for life without seeing the other side of sky. Some calls me Chussie for a joke and I didn't mind. If everyone has to have a label, why shouldn't it be.

 

It's a tough year and it seems more likely it will get tougher before it gets better. Then what have we learned from the crisis except the unpredictable misfortune and life is a bitch which I don't have to necessarily agree with. Crisis makes some points clearer than ever that nothing is more real than living at present and enjoy when you can. No matter what you have and how solid and secure your assets and wealth appears to, in one way or the other, it can be gone just in a blink of an eye, like financial meltdown when bubble is burst, unfortunate natural disaster that blows away everything in seconds, or a fatal car accident that you as the owner of your life are even no longer alive.

 

So when all these things haven't yet happened, when you still wake up at your comfortable home, have plenty food to worry about the balance between taste and nutrition in your diet and drive to countryside to escape the city noise any time you want, be happy for what you have at this moment and enjoy the best of it.

 

After all, the crisis will be end, as any other times in the past, and life will be back on track. Life may not as good as it would have been without crisis, well, we wouldn't have a life at all if we weren't born, would we?