We all know “It” usually refers to nonhuman entities. Even animals such as dogs and cats are usually called boys and girls. Then how can a child be called “It”? Because the child was an It in the eyes of his dearest mother and as a matter of fact the child was a nonexistent to her. This child was David and he was severely abused by his mother for at least 5 to 6 years in his childhood. The book “A Child Called It” is his personal account. This case was the 3rd most severe child abuse case in CA in 1970s.
The word abuse to me most likely means merciless beating. However, the abuse illustrated in this book is really beyond my imagination. I was shocked by how creative and initiative, and how brutal and heartless Mother was. She crammed pieces of soap down into David’s throat; she ordered him to lie on top of the flaming stove and burned his arm; she beat him until his nose was bleeding and his tooth missing; she forced him to drink ammonia or Clorox; as a result, layers of his tongue were scraped away; she stabbed him at stomach using a knife and still forced him to finished cleaning dishes; she starved him for 10 consecutive days; she built a gas chamber using ammonia and Clorox to punish him. Any one of these proved her a devil monster. How could a monster be a mother? David’s life was worse than a slave’s.
In addition to physical torture, Mother abused David by humiliating him as possible as she could. For instance, Mother smeared David’s younger brother’s soiled diaper on his face and asked him to eat defecation; David always wore the same clothes with holes like Sweden cheese when going to school. His lunch was constantly peanut butter sandwich and carrots. David was deprived of the right of taking family wagon to school. After he managed to steal and eat some food, Mother inspected him by forcing him to vomit in toilet, collect and eat it again. When other boys in the family ate their meals on table, David had to either stand in garage or sit at the end of stairs with both hands under his buttock waiting for Mother’s summon for doing chores. He was not permitted to use bathroom when he had a diarrhea after eating leftovers Mother purposefully left in refrigerator until the food was rotten. Mother timed everything she asked him to do. She insulted him by taking away food just because David didn’t finish within her designated time 2 minutes. David led a life even worse than a dog’s. He had to stealthily eat dog’s leftover or leftovers thrown in trash can because of unbearable starvation.
Why did Mother treat David like this? Mother was nice and caring and her house was a paradise full of happiness and laughter before she became alcoholic. Unfortunately, alcohol changed her completely to another person. Yelling, shouting, fighting between Mother and Father dominated the whole family by replacing the warmth and joy. Paradise converted to a madhouse. Mother, to my knowledge, had mental disorder. She tortured David to fulfill her ill pleasure. Furthermore, Mother brainwashed David so that he believed he was a bad boy, and deserved to be punished. The book didn’t describe in detail how naughty and mischievous David was. However, even if he needed to be disciplined, David didn’t deserve to be treated as something without any human’s dignity.
Why didn’t David’s father stop Mother? The answer is Father was a coward. He was a firefighter and liked drinking too. He used to be David’s protector and hero. But little by little, David was only the problem and trigger which ignited the fighting between him and his mad wife. To escape from arguing with Mother, Father run away from the madhouse and left all tragedy to little David. He didn’t even look at him when David was stabbed by his crazy mother, and his wound was bleeding, and he couldn’t even walk steadily, and the only person he could seek help from was Father. How cruel Father was!!! The only thing he told David was “I am sorry”. But only sorry was not sufficient to soothe the boy’s heart and bring him safety in life. Father’s leave took away David’s last hope and pushed him to a deeper abysm.
Why didn’t anybody else help to terminate the misery? Actually, David was eventually saved by his elementary school teachers and local police department. At beginning, he was thought to be a thief as he kept stealing lunch from other schoolmates and grocery stores (Mother’s biggest punishment was to starve him. His life was generally a fight for food.). Later, people noticed he was weak and smelly. Most importantly, school nurse and a substitute teacher noticed bruises and wounds on his body. But David only told what Mother made up for him lest he was punished more viciously. Social workers interfered in vain since mother played trick with on David so that he was afraid of telling the truth. Mother apparently controlled everything and she had no decent relationship with everybody including her own mother, brother, husband and neighbors. That’s why I think she was mentally sick no matter what the reason was. She selectively favored other 4 boys over David for no rational explanations. As a mother, I have no any intelligence to comprehend the behavior of this monster mother. She tarnished the title of Mother.
The boy was amazing. I admire his courage and endurance to survive his nightmare early life. Most importantly, he managed not to be distorted mentally in order to lead a normal adult life. Why didn’t he fight back or run away or turn himself into supporting groups? First, he was brainwashed that he was bad. He should be punished and ostracized, which might help him to learn self-discipline according to Mother. Furthermore, as a little boy, he might also dream that Mother still loved him and she would treat him well if he followed her command to please her. The way he fought back was to endure and survive the uncertainties Mother brought him.
He survived and he was free. I don’t know if Mother would feel regret for what she did to her son someday when her mind was clear. I don’t understand how parents can torture their kids who bring them tremendous joy and sense of accomplishment. Doesn’t a kid’s smile melt parents’ sorrow? Doesn’t a kid’s joke dispel parents’ stress? Isn’t a kid one of the best teachers for parents in the world? Are kids not the most powerful motivation for parents to be better? We are so blessed to have children who respect and love us. How can they be treated even lower than dogs?
When I finished this heart-stopping book, I still could not believe what I read is a true story. It is too tragic to believe. I felt shock, sad, compassionate and angry. Although it happened, I still hope the real world will be better and brighter, especially for our innocent children.
You are so right.