Putting the Brakes on Perfectionism

Show children that you value them more for who they are as people than for what they can do.

Help children separate themselves from their products, particularly their grades.

Help them understand that mistakes are a normal part of learning.

Encourage them to distinguish between the more important assignments (or parts of an assignment) and the less important ones.

Provide a structure that allows them to set realistic goals and create a plan of action.

Help them understand that achievement happens in incremental steps over time.

Explore the lives of great achievers: learning about the challenges many high achievers have faced helps children re-evaluate their expectations about achievement and their attitudes about themselves.

Applaud children's efforts, especially when they take risks or overcome obstacles.

Celebrate creativity and originality.

Involve them in activities that aren't graded or judged.

Help them plan for new challenges: Talk to them about their concerns, what difficulties they might encounter, and what actions they can take, even in the "worst case scenario."

Encourage a sense of humor.

Communicate with the child's teacher