1 大实话/It's True
The teacher was vividly describing the discovery of the law of gravitation. He tried to make the children impressed with its importance.
He said, "Isaac Newton was sitting on the ground looking at the tree. An apple suddenly fell on his head. It led him discover gravitation." And he added, "Isn't that wonderful?"
The "smart boy" in the class replied in a high voice: "Yes, teacher, and he was very fortunate. If looking at his books at school, he wouldn't have discovered anything."
A private didn't notice a young lieutenant and failed to salute him. The lieutenant said sternly, "You did not salute me. For this you must immediately salute one hundred times."
Just then the general came up. When he saw the poor private about to begin, he exclaimed, "What's all this?"
The lieutenant explained, "This ignoramus failed to salute me. I'm making his salute one hundred times as a punishment. "
"Quite right," replied the general smiling, "But do not forget, sir, that upon each occasion you are to salute return."
Brown was very proud of his young son. Once he was talking to a visitor, telling the man how clever his son was.
"The boy is only two years old," he said, "and knows all animals. He's going to be a great naturalist. Here, let me show you."
He took from the bookshelf, placed Bobby on his knee, opened the book and showed him a picture of a giraffe.
"What's a book of natural history that, Bobby?"
"Horsey," said Bobby. Next of a tiger was shown, and Bobby said, "Pussy." Then Brown showed Bobby a picture of lion, and Bobby said, "Doggy." And when a picture of a chimpanzee was shown, Bobby said, "Daddy!"
“马马，”博比回答。 他又指了一张老虎的画片，博比回答说：“猫咪。” 然后布朗又指了一张狮子的画片，博比说：“狗狗。” 他又指了一张黑猩猩的画片，博比说：“爸爸!”
After waiting over 3 frustrating hours at the airport for the arrival of a plane that had been delayed for take-off, a man approached the boarding desk and asked for an arrival-time update. He was concerned because he was meeting his nephew and this was the boy’s 1st flight. "How old is the boy?" the airline representative asked solicitously. "He was 6 when he left for the airport," the man replied sharply.
Nurse: How do you feel after your operation?
Patient: Quite alright, only I can feel two hearts beating inside me.
Nurse: No wonder the doctor who operated on you was looking for his watch everywhere just now.
Two old friends got together after many years and soon fell to discussing their husbands' faults.
We've been married fifteen years, one woman said, and every night after dinner my husband always complains about the food.
How terrible! exclaimed the other. Does it bother you?
Why should it bother me? her friend replied. if he can't only stand his own cooking?