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这篇《History》文书能为她拿下哈佛录取吗?

(2022-12-08 11:40:37) 下一个

白人女生的爬藤文书

GPA: ???

Tests: ???

ECs: ...chosen to US Senate Youth Program... 新闻报道说去白宫见了总统(川)后很兴奋。

Admitted: Duke & Yale

 

Dressed as tiny pilgrim in a summer camp, my passion for history commenced at eight years of age. I dipped candles, made my own Mayflower model out of popsicle sticks, and got my first glimpse into what I owe to those who came before me for the hardship they endured. I also discovered that I had ancestor, John Howland on the Mayflower. I found it hilarious that it was my relative who famously fell off the ship relieving himself.

A couple of years later, I felt the weight of history as I stood on the old North Bridge in Concord Massachusetts. I felt its significance captivated my young soul as I realized my freedom is possible because of those brave and determined men and women who saw a different future for themselves and their country. History became than just words on the page of a dusty book.

Today, history continues to be a live and ever-changing for me. Museums are some of my favorite places, particularly the National World War II Museum and the Holocaust Museum. History is always being created even while the past is shaping the future.

The remnants of my historical obsessions clutter my bedroom. Next to m y bulletin board, there is a piece from the massive Berlin Wall replica I created in seventh grade. On a shelf nearby sits a model Titanic I got at 9 years old. In the corner hangs the white banner of Joan of Arc that I sewed. On my laptop is a sticker of the flag of the French Resistance. And above my desk is a gum wrapper given to me by the Berlin Airlift candy bomber himself.

These exploration of the past has shaped my into who I am today. I am partly the quirky young girl so obsessed with the story of the Titanic that she watched every documentary and dressed up as a survivor to perform her own 10-minute play. Another part of me is the teenager interested in World War II, who spent time at Normandy filling the tragedy of D-Day and who served as the national World War II ambassador interviewing World War II veterans.

My fascination with history isn’t confined to just a battle or an event. I am enthralled by the history of people. History matters to me because it tells the story of passionate individuals. As I listened to the story of veterans, I began to see the past through an empathetic point of view. Learning of the sacrifices soldiers and patriots made for me freedom has filled me the appreciation for the rights that I have.

This gratitude has inspired me become engaged in politics and government to honor what they did by fighting for the rights of others. It led me to successfully advocate for the student representation to the SSSS (a state) Board of Education in the form of Student Advisory Council.

The legacy of those who paved the way moves me to make my own history with the goal of creating a pattern of diplomacy helping to create a more unified world. This responsibility to follow in their footsteps compels me to be fearless. The connection I felt when I stood on the beaches of Normandy or in the East Room of the White House reminds me of where I come from and where I need to go.

I learn about the present by looking to the past whether by examining the Revolutionary War to understand modern political revolutions or by looking at previous civil rights movements to contemplate causes such as March For Our Lives. History inspires me to pursue my own dreams as I see how individuals like Joan of Arc refused to comply with the status quo. Their examples motivate me to see past the box the world puts me in and to view my own possibilities as limitless.

• 不用文书,都已经够了,除非是Republican -avw♀ 给 avw 发送悄悄话 avw 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (11 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 11:41:51

• 就是见了川很兴奋,出来新闻都报了 -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (73 bytes) (52 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 11:43:58

• 那就死了,除非拼爹。不过去白宫本身就是拼爹项目。这种不看文书的。应该也不是自己写的 -avw♀ 给 avw 发送悄悄话 avw 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (9 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 11:44:54

• 再多透露一条,耶鲁拒了她,但杜克录了。觉得哈佛该不该录? -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (6 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 11:48:54

• 她写得其实还可以,我会给A。哈佛的立场我不感兴趣 -avw♀ 给 avw 发送悄悄话 avw 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (7 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 11:50:33

• 赞这眼光! -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (156 bytes) (90 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 11:55:18

• 文书写的真心一般。杜克录了是不是因为stats很高? -无风自飞♀ 给 无风自飞 发送悄悄话 无风自飞 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (6 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:04:10

• 对,Stats肯定高,杜克就是有这个眼光 -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (6 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:07:43

• 单从文书以及文书中透露的EC,应该木有进H -无风自飞♀ 给 无风自飞 发送悄悄话 无风自飞 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (7 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:12:45

• 赞这眼光! -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (4 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:05:33

• 巧妙的揭示了自己的家庭背景,但是对历史的理解太肤浅 -windyLL♀ 给 windyLL 发送悄悄话 windyLL 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (18 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:10:31

• 觉得挺不错的,但没有stats光看文章说不准,有了足够stats,这篇文章应该是录了 -米汤♂ 给 米汤 发送悄悄话 米汤 的博客首页 米汤 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (2 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:31:20

• 我没有她Stats -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (2 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:06:08

• 我也觉得对历史的理解太表面,历史是个沉重的话题,这个里面看不到反思 -最爱韭菜盒子♀ 给 最爱韭菜盒子 发送悄悄话 最爱韭菜盒子 的个人群组 (28 bytes) (13 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:53:54

• 一共就400年历史,除了把萝卜李推倒,就是把萝卜李再立起来。 -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (48 bytes) (11 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:07:42

• 不是的,历史上真正发生了什么没人知道,历史其实有很多version,而为什么我们只学一个version? -windyLL♀ 给 windyLL 发送悄悄话 windyLL 的个人群组 (76 bytes) (7 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:14:24

• 也不一定非要谈whose version of history. 通过历史谈眼下和未来也很有意义。这篇文章最后提及, -AutoFill123♂ 给 AutoFill123 发送悄悄话 AutoFill123 的个人群组 (66 bytes) (13 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:59:51

• This is not an paper, anyway -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (0 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 18:11:48

• 我觉得得看她的stats才能判断。单凭文书感觉作者就是那种典型的富人家庭的私校生女孩。 -phoenix05♀ 给 phoenix05 发送悄悄话 phoenix05 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (3 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:22:40

• 这种孩子进大学不是靠essay,连stats可能都不太重要,要看家庭背景是否足够强,能否给她一个强EC。 -windyLL♀ 给 windyLL 发送悄悄话 windyLL 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (3 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:28:04

• 这种女孩确实有优势,家庭背景生活方式是藤校喜欢的那种,很fit。也是藤校里富家子弟wife的人选。 -phoenix05♀ 给 phoenix05 发送悄悄话 phoenix05 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (6 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:31:56

• 嗯。这个角度很毒。耶鲁拒了 -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (2 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:10:13

• 耶鲁不是跟H就是跟P, 如果耶鲁不看好那就玄了 -米汤♂ 给 米汤 发送悄悄话 米汤 的博客首页 米汤 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (1 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 15:11:33

• 是啊,五月花上没几个留下来, 这么wasp太 fit; 不过查一下据说后代有三千万 -米汤♂ 给 米汤 发送悄悄话 米汤 的博客首页 米汤 的个人群组 (1919 bytes) (45 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:32:20

• 如果再玩点field hockey或者lacrosse就100%fit了 :) -windyLL♀ 给 windyLL 发送悄悄话 windyLL 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (3 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 12:38:03

• 楼上几位,就让你们说说她能不能录哈课真难啊 -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (348 bytes) (61 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:05:03

• 我觉得是No,单就文书而言。总体上文笔不错,后面的段落有些层次混乱和凑字数的感觉。 -其乐无穷♂ 给 其乐无穷 发送悄悄话 其乐无穷 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (4 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:15:36

• 我觉得不功不过。 Prompt 是哪个? -trivial♀ 给 trivial 发送悄悄话 trivial 的个人群组 (72 bytes) (19 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:24:47

• Interest。这篇就是没Story只有Statement -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (2 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 18:10:41

• Essay 表现了她的未来从政 Passion. H 录了 -北京姐♀ 给 北京姐 发送悄悄话 北京姐 的个人群组 (20 bytes) (21 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:31:09

• 赞! -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (0 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 18:08:12

• 我觉得essay一般。写出了对历史的兴趣,没写出leader的潜质。没录。 -phoenix05♀ 给 phoenix05 发送悄悄话 phoenix05 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (1 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:34:33

• 参加US Senate Youth Program位于国会大厦的人很少,PAGE 项目人更少 -Cambridge617♂ 给 Cambridge617 发送悄悄话 Cambridge617 的个人群组 (66 bytes) (66 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:10:18

• 啥是 PAGE, 来紫檀就是长见识,不时冒出来从来没听说过的词 -阿拉拉♂ 给 阿拉拉 发送悄悄话 阿拉拉 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (2 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:39:43

• 链接在这里 -Cambridge617♂ 给 Cambridge617 发送悄悄话 Cambridge617 的个人群组 (180 bytes) (37 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 14:45:15

• H没录 -amiyumi♀ 给 amiyumi 发送悄悄话 amiyumi 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (6 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 13:46:56

• 录了。 -jusforfun♂ 给 jusforfun 发送悄悄话 jusforfun 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (5 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 14:16:14

• 赞! -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (0 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 18:08:47

• 挺好的。条理清楚,和自己的EC相对应。她其他方面都有竞争力的话我觉得这Essay过关了。 -randomness♀ 给 randomness 发送悄悄话 randomness 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (3 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 14:49:42

• 赞! -贾平凸♂ 给 贾平凸 发送悄悄话 贾平凸 的博客首页 贾平凸 的个人群组 (0 bytes) (0 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 18:09:05

• 过来看谜底:)耶鲁没拒她呀(更正:拒了),剧透还带虚晃一枪的:D 另外也说明: -安娜阿姨♀ 给 安娜阿姨 发送悄悄话 安娜阿姨 的个人群组 (277 bytes) (24 reads) 12/08/2022 postreply 18:36:30

= = = 揭晓谜底= = =

大家猜得结果,50-50吧,可能还不到。喜欢这篇文笔的3/13,喜欢这篇申请文书的4/13

谜底揭晓:

REA--Harvard/ACCEPTED

RD---Duke/accepted; Yale/rejepted; UPenn/WL; Cornell/rejected; Brown/rejected

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