杀生防身

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Well, do ya, punk?


侦探卡拉汉 - “Dirty Harry” 和他那威力无比的 .44 口径左轮手枪
插图选自 http://en.wikipedia.org/

朋友甲，职业科学，能文善武。朋友乙，职业买办，能言善吹。

朋友甲供职美八军五师，Platoon leader，双手使枪百步穿杨；朋友乙供职沪上洋行，买办头领，双手使笔妙笔生花。

朋友甲习武爱枪，持短枪两杆。一曰 Beretta 92， 另曰 Smith & Wesson 4513 TSW；并循规蹈矩每二十一天必对着纸片靶心，Full metal jacket，霹呖啪啦弹壳横飞硝烟弥漫地至少五十下的环境污染一下。美其名曰：曲不离口，枪不离手。行曲不离口之效，得枪不离手之益；促进资本主义消费还他妈的创造就业机会。

一日，朋友乙买办的干活飞来美利坚。事毕，经共同朋友窜掇，寻之朋友甲，要来喝几盅。完毕，朋友甲拾掇客房留宿朋友乙。顺便，将藏于客房衣橱的短枪按惯例退下弹匝检查枪膛。朋友乙见 Beretta 92，钨黑狰狞；4513 TSW，银灰嚇然，便市民文化言不由衷：

“这是真的假的？”

朋友甲眯眼查看枪管来复线，不语。朋友乙商场买办兵不厌诈，市民文化欲擒故纵：

“持枪有啥用？”

朋友甲咬牙切齿，如 Dirty Harry，终于恶狠狠地从牙缝蹦出四字：

杀生防身！

*****

“Dirty” Harry Callahan (Clint Eastwood):

I know what you're thinking.

"Did he fire six shots or only five?"

Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky?

Well, do ya, punk?