习近平的团队就像是阿加莎克里斯蒂的小说『无人生还』

 

 

第 19 届亚运将于本月 23 日至 10 月 8日在中国杭州盛大举办，将邀集亚洲多国运动好手一同与会切磋体能，一拼高下。不过，近日杭州亚运的宣传海报疑似传出“辱华”嫌疑，根据社群媒体X （前推特）账号 @whyyoutouzhele 8日所发布的推文显示，杭州亚运金华市分赛区各项目竞赛海报中，台湾与亚洲各国并列齐称为“国家”，按照中国小粉红过往标准，该海报印刷负责人中共金华市团委已构成辱华。

杭州亚运将于不久后盛大展开，当地政府正紧锣密鼓地筹备赛事。据 @whyyoutouzhele所公布的海报内容中显示，此份海报中共有 3处将台湾称为国家，包含一开始杭州亚运的介绍文，再到赛事字段中的足球项目及藤球项目中，都将台湾与韩国、泰国、印尼及马来西亚等国并列称为国家，并不是台湾在以往参与国际赛事中常用的“中华台北”。

该海报负责人据传是中共金华市团委，按照以往中国人民判定的辱华标准，该份海报已构成辱华事实， X 网友也纷纷留言笑称:“我不辱华华自辱”、“这下算是官方接受台湾是独立国家了！”、“分裂国家！要捉起来了”等字句嘲讽中国小粉红出征辱华案件的举动。

 

 

 

 

 

 

One day this big, nasty, sweaty woman wearing a raggedy sleeveless sundress walks into a bar.

She raises her right arm, revealing a big hairy armpit as she points to all the people sitting at the bar and asks, “What man out there will buy a lady a drink?”

The whole bar goes dead silent as the patrons try to ignore her.

At the end of the bar, a skinny little piss head slams his hand on the bar and says, “Barman, I want to buy that ballerina a drink.”

The barman pours the drink and the woman chugs it down.

After she’s completed the drink, she turns again to the throng and points around at all of them, again revealing the hairy armpit, saying, “What man out there will buy a lady a drink?”

Once again, the little drunk slaps his hand down on the bar and slurs to the barman, “Sir, I would like to buy the ballerina another drink.”

After serving the lady her second drink, the barman approaches the little drunkard and says, “It’s your business if you want to buy the lady a drink, but why do you keep calling her a ballerina?”

To which, the drunk replies, “Sir, in my eyes, any woman who can lift her leg up that high has got to be a ballerina.”

 

 

 

A month before my wedding, my fiancée told me she mistakenly left her favorite hoodie at her sister’s apartment and asked me to go get it. I knocked on the door and her sister answered, wearing yoga pants and a low-cut top. I’d always thought my fiancée’s sister was hot but she was exceptionally s*xy today. Her hair was still wet from a shower and when she gave me a hug I could smell the incredible lotion she always used. She brought out the hoodie for me and as I was about to turn and leave she said “What’s your hurry?”
I replied, “no hurry, just wanted to let you get back to whatever you were doing.”
She said, “I know you’re about to marry my sister, but I need you to know I think you’re super hot, and I’ve always wanted to have s*x with you. If you want to have a last little bit of fun before you walk down that aisle, it will stay between us forever.”

Without saying a word I turned and bolted for the door as fast as I could, making a bee line for my car.
As I approached the car, I see my fiancée and her parents standing there with huge smiles on their faces. Her dad immediately said, “son, you just passed a pretty hard test there and I want you to know how happy I am to see my daughter marry such an upstanding young man.”

The sister was now walking up from behind and she said, “I have to hand it to you there; I didn’t think you’d turn me down.” I was dumbfounded. We all hugged and went out for dinner. And the moral of the story is: Always keep your condoms in your glove compartment