Man on the street

I keep asking myself, how long I have been not writing anything in English. Maybe one year, maybe two years? Today I met someone on the street, he did give me some questions. It was a bit weird for me when someone who you are not familiar at all, but absolutely wants some answers from you. He was direct and brave. I did give the answer to him, he was happy indeed. Why? I don’t think I will do the same to ask any strangers on the street of Nanjing, just for answering myself. Of course I have this desire, but I am the person lacking of courage sometime in some ways… He was nice, I feel the expectation from him, I hinted that I can not reach it, and told myself: what should I return to this? Rainy day, which makes me slow down, breathing, thoughtful… My old friends, my old memories, those old places where I grew up, where I got out… Everything is turning in my mind. I knew this feeling, that is beautiful, isn’t it? I called parents today, told them that Chinese new year is fading away from me, so wide, the longing is getting pale, so fragile, but I am feeling well cause I know people can be changed even without any conscious. Looking out of the window, the gray sky, he is crying. I am tired, or I am getting lost because I am losing the feeling to give… But maybe tomorrow, I try, and try to give something, at least to myself first…