UNFORTUNATE PERSONALITIES-- Mortgage Coach Series(ZT)

The best advice I ever received in sales was from my regional manager, a long-time mortgage veteran who had seen it all. He told me, "Ken you are in sales and you will meet many people. Some of those people have been born with an unfortunate personality. If at all possible, avoid these people!" Great advice! In many cases, these people are "unavoidable." When one of your very loyal real estate partners gives you a referral and his or her client is "personality challenged," you have to make the best of it. So when we do encounter "personalities of the third kind," what can we do? There are lots of ways to work with difficult people if we know the personality behind the person. Here is an introductory course in "Hard to Deal With Difficult People 101." 

"The know it all:"  These people gain their personal self-worth from being right. When they are wrong, not only can they not admit it, but they become angry. The way to work with these people is to allow them to be right as long as it does not affect the business transaction. When it does, use "positioning questions" to slowly move them to the correct answer. You can also beat them to the punch on issues you know will be volatile. Here is an example:  "Mr. Smith, you are a very informed person in this process, so I know you are aware of..." Use the know it all's own ego to your advantage. 

"The whiner:"  You know the type, everything is negative. They whine about the process, the rate, the closing date, everything! Good news on these people, whine with them! In reality, these people only want to complain. If you allow the complaining, and continually empathize, they eventually calm down.   

"The manipulator:"  This is a dangerous personality! They want to trick you into either saying the wrong thing or committing to a concession of some type. Once you do, they will hold you to it and even go over your head to get what they want. You will recognize this personality early based on the type of questions or statements these people use.  "You will be cutting the rate, correct?" If you say, "I will certainly do what I can," you are in trouble! Recognize this forceful statement for what it is:  a bully tactic. The correct response is, "Mr. Smith, you have a very competitive rate and I am excited we are able to work with you." This personality type will also ask hypothetical questions that begin with, "What if..." or "Have you ever..." Never answer these types of questions. Instead ask, "Do you have a specific question or situation of which I should be aware?" When the person says, "No," ignore the question. 

"The unhappy person:" Unfortunately, some people are just plain miserable! In fact, this personality enjoys misery. Remember the old saying, "misery loves company?" It is true! I am not saying be miserable with him or her, but do express empathy and when you are at a point you want to fire this client, be patient and caring! Yes, it is hard to do but you will win! 

"The negotiator:"  Someone attended one too many negotiation courses! These people approach the mortgage process as if they were buying a used car and they believe that with the right techniques, you will give in and reduce the rate, fees, or some other concession. You will know this personality the very first time you talk on the telephone. He or she will tell you someone else has a better rate or that your rate is not good enough. This requires a very simple strategy, ask for details! Example:  "Mr. Smith, if you could give me more details, I might be able to address your concern. Rates change daily and sometimes even more often. I will need to ask you a number of questions before I can answer your concern." They seldom have a "real rate." This is a tactic to get you to reduce your rate. 

There are more "unfortunate personalities," but these will get you started on the right path and help reduce some of the mortgage headaches. By the way Sam, thanks for the advice! I put it to good use and it has made all the difference!