睿妈睿爸的教育手记
【RAISING BOYS FIT TO CHANGE THE WORLD】
子女论坛有一位网友叫dudaan，据他自己讲，在他的辅导下，不下１０个孩子都得以成功进入名校，而且他自己也有意写一本书，来讲述这些名校生的成才故事。既然咱比较留意这方面的信息，而且这本书又是说咱华人孩子的，所以对这本书我一直报有很高的期望，希望里面能够透露一些教育孩子的秘技。可惜，前不久dudaan发帖说，这本书的出版计划搁浅了，具体原因吗，出人意料，居然是他收集的学生自述与自己最初的想法相去甚远。例如，有的孩子把能进入名校完全归于运气，说连自己都没有想到能进名校，还有的孩子说进名校完全是操作和包装的结果，更有甚者，一个孩子说招生过程充满了拉关系和弄虚作假的显现，学生为了上好大学千方百计讨好中学校长和利用校外关系。很多获奖的东西都有水分，有的甚至是家长手下的雇员做出来的。另外令人吃惊的是，这些孩子还透露了这些所谓的精英在高中的胡作非为。
dudaan: 出乎意外的24位顶尖大学学生自述
说实话，看了dudaan的帖子，我确实比较吃惊，因为一直以来我都认为美国大学的录取比较合理公正，孩子得靠自己的实力来决定上那所大学，看来自己还是太天真了。
正巧，前两天在Wall Street Journal上看到一片文章A Desperate Need for Acceptance，说的是美国大学录取现在变得多么的荒谬。拿申请人的背景来说,前Dartmouth招生官员Michelle A. Hernandez的话说，最有可能进入名校的孩子，“Neither of your parents attended college at all, your father is a factory worker, and your mom is on disability. . . . ”。困难最大的孩子是“Your father went to Yale as an undergraduate and then
另外一个畅销书《What High Schools Don't Tell You》的作者Elizabeth Wissner-Gross说“A high-school student who gets good grades, serves as student body president and plays varsity football may be a remarkable person, but to an admissions officer his excellence may look rather conventional and diffuse. Better to cultivate a particular skill or enthusiasm. The ideal admissions-candidate is thus a prize-winning gymnast, a fluent reader of both Greek and Latin, a math champion, a successful entrepreneur or a violin virtuoso (all, ideally, with working-class parents, of course). ”正象这本书的副标题所说的，“300+ Secrets to Make Your Kid Irresistible to Colleges by Senior Year.”，她在书中提出了孩子要从Middle School就开始准备，而且要充分利用暑假，working in a local research lab, attending a math camp or trying to write the great American novel ，这样才能早日实现名校梦想。可是孩子不是需要玩吗？Elizabeth说，children who insist on hanging out with already known friends during the summer often miss out on wonderful opportunities. 是啊，buddies can be an obstacle if you care about getting into college.
名校，名校，真的值得花这么大的代价去追求吗？
“A high-school student who gets good grades, serves as student body president and plays varsity football may be a remarkable person, but to an admissions officer his excellence may look rather conventional and diffuse. Better to cultivate a particular skill or enthusiasm. The ideal admissions-candidate is thus a prize-winning gymnast, a fluent reader of both Greek and Latin, a math champion, a successful entrepreneur or a violin virtuoso (all, ideally, with working-class parents, of course). ” (source: Elizabeth Wissner-Gross, What High Schools Don't Tell You: 300+ Secrets to Make Your Kid Irresistible to Colleges by Senior Year )
It is interesting and making sense. The statement is the conclusion of some observations based on who have been selected by good colleges, apparently. The reason that leads to this results is also obvious. The kids described in the later part of the paragraph are much more unique than those in the former part, which is indicating their unique mindsets and their intelligence. Therefore, they could be those trendsetters (trendsetters are someone who are innovative in some areas, for example fashion or technology. It is what I read about in Tipping Points) and they may lead breakthroughs. The former kids would fall into the categories of mainstream.
The most important part of this paragraph is not what these kids are, it lies in how to educate or provide an appropriate environment for your kids (since most of the readers of this book must be seeking solutions on this aspect). It seems the author has not yet suggested any solution above. The most straightforward one is to pick some oddy things for your kids, cultivate the enthusiasm, and train them. Maybe, providing tutorial on Latin could be popular in the future.
However, buying this book to look for solution is already too late for the education if your kids are about to apply for a college. Besides timing, there is a problem with the focus.All in all, to deliver your love to your kids, it is not about what a good college want. It is about what your kids want. If he/she can't stand with a life without something different everyday, just let them explore different things. In such case, Latin must be much more interesting than Spanish (the language the largest population speak in the world). If he/she feel comfortable with following what others do, just let him/her be a football player if he wants to. He could excel. There are no absolute answers and you kids, you, and the other member of your family would be better off if the environment is tailored in such a way that everybody is feeling comfortable and inspired in one way or another everyday.
第二种大概是上不了，反正对他来说，吃不到的葡萄都是酸的。
如果我的儿子上不了名校，可能我也说不值得。
不过无论如何，上名校的出路和不上名校的出路是不是都一样，天下人都知道。
不过上不了名校，绝对不是世界末日，事实上，不上名校，也会有好的前途，不过上名校的，将来在社会上多占点便宜却不容置疑。
But most kids are not for one reason or another. So one can't really blame pursuing good schools.
男人们的迷思------美人，美人，真的值得花这么大的代价去追求吗？
女人们的迷思------婚姻，婚姻，真的值得花这么大的代价去追求吗？
小资们的迷思------名牌，名牌，真的值得花这么大的代价去追求吗？
政治家的迷思------权力，权力，真的值得花这么大的代价去追求吗？
........
全是废话！！