Stat2006-04-04 18:00:31回复悄悄话
Good idea! It would be great if KuamgYe and MuMan would provide some poems that you like and provide a little note (optional, such as how you were inspired, or what you like about it...). QY can then add on comment if you still feel like to. Certainly YQ can select more from KY and WM's work.
旷野2006-04-04 16:48:47回复悄悄话
The one without ID is me (you knew it's me don't you Sean?). Sorry, YuQin. I did give my ID (why not?) but somehow the system left it out (I regarded it to be a warning - I'm taling too much):)) Be very sure of yourself, Sean, as said you have my best wishes. Just keep moving.
Stat2006-04-04 15:54:26回复悄悄话
I appreciate your remark.
My attitude towards the net was that we were all a bunch of IDs. So I would only pay attention to the words from an ID instead of the ID itself. But I just realized there are feelings among IDs. So I am reflecting on myself.
I never thought you were nagging. If everyone can share his opinion with others, we will all benefit. The key is to share, not to demand others to adopt our opinion.
Stat2006-04-02 20:50:18回复悄悄话
You are always very understanding. Thank you for telling me the rationale behind it. I also read a progression in the poem. 微小, 平凡, 转瞬即逝... once we realize that is what we are, we will be less blue and calmer. I don't think I know more of 音韵格律 than you do. It is important though, in my opinion, for free-style poets to understand 音韵格律 since unlike the LvShi, Ci or Qv, there is no "proved" structure for free style poems. Some people are natural with 音韵格律, but for the rest it will be helpful to learn it or at least to learn about it. What you said in the last paragraph is very flattering. I prefer the "twin star" scenario -- the two stars revolving around each other, and to the eyes of others, they are just like one. Every starry night, you would see many of them on the sky. Few know they are actually two united in one. I hope this coincide with your 海天一色, "归一"的意味. Good night!
"您意思里透著不情愿修改的味道"---->这样的判语,难道不是"主观艺术创作者性格"?:))))))))))
玩笑,并无不敬之意:)多点理解,少点误解:))
已经够小心了，还是打了错字。抱歉！
您意思里透著不情愿修改的味道，＜辅助方式＞想想这个用词？诗需要怎样的＜扶助＞？＜加注＞算了！？＜味道大减＞？主观艺术创作者性格，昭昭然！其他都是空话。罢了！
就个人的经验而言,标点为一种表达情感的辅助方式. 有些标点, 舍去了,全诗会味道大减,非常可惜.当然,对于标点方面和断句方面的尝试,我确实做的很少. 一般都是从心随意,以音律和情感抑扬为上. 您的建议,提醒了我去思考一些可能疏忽了的地方.谢谢.
您是主角，一切磨练以主角从。哈哈！要脚不为，配角吠吠。不美！通知後，自当与您。
那好！尝试好後，通知一番。我并不是指一个标点都不要用！而是要像画龙点睛一般。珍惜著用。文字还是主体，标点提供无法断行的另一个选项与转折。这首，我也偷去试试看！
我留意到了您作品里的尝试.会结合您现在的建议一并思考.其实,也一直在考虑中:) 还望多指导. 希望您在此也论述一下您自身的体会?? 先行谢过.
S一直只能写英文,我也是到了昨天才第一次看到他输入的中文.他应该会继续努力的:))
谢谢您.
那我就算是得到你大笔一挥的"同意"二字啦:))))谢谢!:))
冒昧提一建议，给您供作练习。把这作品标点全去掉，再排列组合看看！可否玩出不同的风格？当然！在您有空闲时。烦转Ｓ君，看不懂他的论述，深深遗憾！
在这空间里, 不就是诗吗? 能一起分享, 不就是甜蜜吗? :)))
旷兄幽默:)) WXC既然有那么智能的系统,我们就更要多说话来测试一下嘛!:))
我在此就说明了啊, 在我这里你怎么"nagging"也不是nagging, 无任欢迎:))) 我知道S也不会介意的. 我们都有分享不同意见的自由. 你的真实性情和热诚,在诗中就可见一斑. 我们都很欣赏. 你和舞曼MM的新诗,自成一格. 我还和舞曼M说, 希望能得到允许,ZT/收藏一些她的好诗到我这里. 正想问一下你呢.若我在我的BLOG里放一些你的作品(或许还会加点评论:) 不知道能否得到你的同意? :)
My attitude towards the net was that we were all a bunch of IDs. So I would only pay attention to the words from an ID instead of the ID itself. But I just realized there are feelings among IDs. So I am reflecting on myself.
I never thought you were nagging. If everyone can share his opinion with others, we will all benefit. The key is to share, not to demand others to adopt our opinion.
Thank you for your kind note.