中秋节将至,送礼请谨慎 (18+)
(2014-09-06 16:25:36)
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一位基层女干部,在中秋节之际,想给省城领导送礼,思考后慎重地拿出了两套方案:
① 如果领导不是很热情,送土特产;② 如果领导很热情,送购物卡。
第二天,进城到领导家,领导倒茶很热情。决定送卡,边喝茶,心里也很紧张,弄得满身是汗,临出门时掏出卡放在茶几上,逃回宾馆!
到了宾馆怎么也开不了门,原来刚才送的是宾馆房门卡!
当晚,她没睡好,领导更没睡好……中秋节将至,送礼请谨慎。
KAMASUTRA LESSONS:
1. Kamasutra says : If you suck one nipple, the women herself offers the other one. And that was the origin of "buy one get one free"!
2. Did you ever notice: everything on a woman's upper body starts with a "B". Blouse, Bra, Bikini, Boobs & lower body with a "P" Peticoat, panties, pussy...No wonder men suffer from high B P!
3. Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you dress only yourself. Moral: In life no one helps you once you're screwed.
4. Success is like pregnancy. Everybody congratulates you but nobody knows how many times you got screwed to achieve it.
5. What is the difference between frustration and satisfaction? What the Fuck! and What a Fuck!
6. 3 people having sex is a threesome, 2 is a twosome. So next time someone calls you 'HANDSOME', don't take it as a compliment!
7. Life is like a dick, sometimes it becomes hard for no reason.
8. Practical thought: A husband is supposed to make his wife's panties wet, not her eyes. A wife is supposed to make her husband's dick hard, not his life..!
Now that I've educated. you, go ahead and educate someone else.
When a lady is pregnant,
all her friends touch her stomach ad say "Congrats!".
But none of them come and touch the man's Penis and say "Well done!".
Moral: Hard work is never appreciated: Only result matters..