englishtongue

I am not Bridget Jones. I write not because of bordom but of the sheer sensation of self-awarness. However, like her, I do have
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drifting away

(2005-07-13 22:14:59) 下一个

        Horrible! It is absolutely incorrigible of me for not writing a word for so many days. My hands are already getting rusty as I am typing, not to mention my mind. I can’t think. A whole day, no, almost a whole week was wasted, and I am not doing anything. In the midst of pacing up for Friday’s moving out, I just realized that I am once again drifting both physically and mentally away from my previous stance.

       No doubt, I belong to the race adrift without knowing where I am headed for. In the five years of my precious rosy youth in the land of cowboys, I have drifted from one place to another and shared rooms with countless roomies, Caucasians, Koreans, Japanese, and Chinese. Not only their nationalities are enough to form a small United Nations, they are also among Christians, Taoists, Buddhists, and atheists. Luckily, none of them are the relatives of Mr. Scrooge, and while the advantage of it is that I had a really good time with each of them, my brain still hasn’t picked up the skill of calculating every penny of my daily expenditure.

       From the apartment on campus to the one off campus, then to the outskirt of Houston, and now to Houston, I am drifting close to the big city, which, as a matter of fact, claims to be the fourth largest city in the U. S. but looks only like spreading blocks left without blueprints. Frowning at the boxes, big and small, stacked across the room, I asked myself, am I floating to the peak of the wave or am I just going with the flow?

      To the peak of the wave, I cannot say. After all, everything has just started, a new apartment, a new job, and a new expectation to my relationship. Things are leading me to a new leaf of my life. I am no longer the poor international student who had to walk home from campus in the heat of Texas’s scorching summer while everyone else was driving. With your own apartment, you don’t need to poke your head out of the room to the roomie watching a loud TV show and pretend to be polite, “Can you be so kind to tune the volume lower? I am taking a tap.” The sense of ownership and freedom is quite refreshing. A romantically decorated bedroom, weekends filled with shopping spree and sensational afternoons in the coffee shop, enlightening visits to the museums, and ┅ isn’t it nice?

      Well, come on. Don’t be a whistling Dixie! No more TV. I am so poisoned by Sex and the City. I am in a place full of cowboys and my life will be spinning around 1960 around the clock, my working place by 1960, my apartment close to 1960, the gigantic mall and cinema by 1960. A straight line with no shape. A good start. And more, I will be washed ashore pretty soon with Jared leaving me high and dry. A new start is not easy at all.  

      Anyway, I am not alone in the drifting generation. Many are probably doing the same thing as I do. No more meandering. Don’t worry about tomorrow for tomorrow has its own things to worry about. Suffice for today is its own trouble. Good night!  

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WYWY 回复 悄悄话 It seems that you stop blogging here after this one.
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