最近我家老大迷上了一种重金属的band,好像咆哮体的摇滚乐,弄得家里不得安宁,他一放这个我就恨不能马上给他关掉或者躲出去。他自己说听这个特别励志,歌词或者优美或者气壮山河,还自己学唱这种发声方法,把我烦得够呛。
里面有一句歌词意思好像是真正的peaceful 是经过 struggle才得来的,挺有哲理的。所以想要peaceful,还要先struggle。
男孩迷恋电子游戏 (女孩也爱DS什么的),恐怕是这个时代对家长的很大挑战,尤其是漫长的暑假即将来临。严防严堵不是办法,而且还后患无穷。我的一个朋友的儿子去年上了Berkeley,他的roommate就整天抱着游戏白天黑夜地玩儿,经常逃课,好在人聪明,还能混个C了事。另一个在国内上大学的女孩也说,她宿舍里4个人,有一个整天玩电脑,晚上不睡觉,搅得其他3人不得安宁。这大都是上大学前家里管的太严了,好不容易解放了,就大玩特玩了。
其实这也是个代沟的问题,想想我们小时候是不会想到有这种电游的乐趣和烦恼的。我们对电子游戏了解的比孩子们少得多。
看过一篇分析,说明各种media对孩子(其实也包括大人)的影响,列表如下:
Media | Negatives | Positives |
Television Shows (sitcoms, reality shows, docudramas) | Mindlessness Superficiality Distortion, such as fictionalized history, altered to reflect cultural or political bias; corrupt values portrayed as normal/acceptable Draw on available time | Diversion to relieve stress Information Socialization, so a child can discuss shared experiences with other children; proper behavior portrayed |
Television News Programs | Single-mindedness, or the absence of competing ideas Brevity, regardless of complexity of issues Designed for adults, so children can be overwhelmed by pessimism, horrors, challenges | Information
|
Video Games | Replay button, therefore able to ignore consequences Detachment from reality Draw on available time | Development of thinking Stress reduction/entertainment Coordination development Opportunity to bond, play a game with your child is like “tossing the ball.” |
Internet | Inappropriate information Draw on available time | Information access Potential for growth through exposure to other ideas, thoughts, systems, etc. Entertainment |
IM’ing/E-mail | Draw on available time Inappropriate reinforcement of negative ideas, concepts from friends | Social interaction Information sharing
|
从中可以看出,Video game和Internet的优点方面是显而易见的,多了解一些,可以帮助我们站在孩子的角度考虑问题,从而不至于一看到孩子打游戏就头痛、焦虑,还可以帮他们更好地安排和选择。
实际上,如果不是限制太多,孩子也会学会自我控制,这是最理想的结果。