写作训练来自summercamp

再谈写作（一）文字的训练是基础 [引用]儿子4年纪，今年正式学写作。今天拿回了一些work sheet，我大概看了一遍，对老师们细致地教写作的过程还是颇有感触的，特意把这些work sheet的内容写出来和大家分享。因为内容很多，我只能摘要一些，再加一些儿子的练习便于理解。一次不能完成，我还是写个系列吧。今天先写文字的训练。我以为写作就是教怎么写文章，开头，中间，结尾，其实不然，写作要从用词开始。实际上也好理解，要盖房子先备砖。1）写作首先是文字的训练，学习用 high vocabulary，不用简单的词。例如简单的颜色的词，yellow， blue等是preschool word，写作要用college colors,如bule有azure，indigo，purple是plum，fuchsia，lavender，magenta，lilac。白色是ashen，ivory，绿色是chartreuse，olive等等大概20几个词吧。下面是儿子的练习要求：Use vivid vocabulary to describe a sunset at beachI was watching the sunset from our vacation house. The wavy clear ocean licking the golden sand. On the calm quiet beach nobody was walking. The white seagulls hovering above the vacation house. It was the most perfect sunset ever.这是写作的第一节课，可以看出孩子的vivid vocabulary还不够丰富，整个一年的写作就是围绕着vivid vocabulary做文章，看到最后你会发现，经过老师的训练，孩子还是很有进步的。2）文字游戏 alliterations 合辙押韵例如 The clouds moved like wispy waves across the sky.其中wispy waves。一些经典名字也是alliterations，像Mickey Mouse， friend or foe， rough and ready等等20几个。下面是儿子写的练习要求-something associated with summer，autumn，winter，spring儿子写道 sizzling summer Saturdays，lovely leaves lying low，freezing frortg sunflowers, sunny sunflower sprout要求 Using state names, create your own alliteration sentences.一共要求写20个，选几个儿子写的例子。1，Alaska's astronauts always asks about after life.2,Canada's cool cupcakes come from curious cows.3,Washington washes whales on Wednesday.3）象声词 Onomatopoeia例如。drip sound made by a drop of waterwhish sound made by something moving quickly through airSquek sound made by a mouse 等等20几个词吧儿子的练习要求：Write a paragraph using examples of OnomatopoeiaBoom!! The microwave exploded and crash!! the dished fell. Scream!!! the people were running because a hurricane was in progress. Fling!! the nails flew it was aiming my way. Then poof, the things went away and I realized it was a dream.今天先到这，明天再写，码字不易，还得外加查字典，累了。再谈写作（二）特殊的写作方法 Idiom Similes Hyperbole [引用]1)Idioms:strange saying 成语 这个好理解，英语里成语也很多，需要多读多看。例如：fly off the handle means to lose one's temperegg on your face means embarrassedin a pickle means in troublego to bat for means defendbury the hatchet means forgive还有像 a penny for your thoughts，That's the way the cookie crumbles等等通过上下文才能理解的成语。儿子他们好像学了有50，60个成语吧。2）Similes 比喻能Striking it rich!所以非常重要。这也就不解释了。例如 happy as a clam, thick as pea soup, mad as a wet hen, sly as a fox等等太多下面是儿子写的比喻的练习，选几个有意思的。sad as a singer who lost his voicebright as day light to a vampirelaughs like a mad scientistscared as a girl in a hunted housegrows like a magic beanThe actor was nervous as a man knowing that the world is going to end.Her blue eyes are like a mixture of the ocean and the sky.Grandpa's laughter sounds like horse choking on a wrecking ball.Success tastes like a all you can eat sushi buffet.比喻的写法非常重要，是重点。他们练了很多.还有一种比喻的写法是直接写成is,are.还是看看我儿子写的练习吧。A raindrop is a miniature ocean in the sky.Mom's hug was a cup of hot chocolate.Rock music is a bad headache.The winning point was happiness bursting into fireworks.3)Hyperbole 夸张例如 It was so hot you could fry an egg on the sidewalk.The program was so boring that even the flies went to sleep.下面是儿子写的一些夸张的句子。He was so strong he could lift the Eiffel tower with his pinky.I was so tired I could sleep in World War 2.He was so hot with fever I could cook lasagna on his face.下一篇是拟人和感官形容词再谈写作（三）描写的方法 personification and sense words [引用]1） personification 拟人的写法例如：用描写人的动词写wind,可以用whisper， howl， race写成句子就是 The wind whispered through the tree branches.看看儿子写的练习要求：List three human actions for each item,use personification to write a sentence for each item.rain: sad, tapping, knocking, roaring, screaming句子：The rain was knocking on the windowsriver:rushing, dancing,runs句子：The river was rushing through the forest like a cheetah.waterfall: roar,rumbling,tumbles,screaming句子：The waterfall was roaring until my ears fell off.还有很多就不一一举例了。2）Using sense words.Sense words tell how something looks, sounds,smells, feels, or tastes例如without sense words的句子是：The stars shone in the sky.with sense words就变成：Bright yellow stars sparkled against the black sky.这部分最难，就是用恰当的adjectives描写。这部分老师强调的还是vivid vocabulary。儿子的练习要求：Write sense words to describe each onea snowflake: delicate, falling, beautifulwalnuts: nutty,hard,scrumptiousthe seashore: refreshing, relaxing, coola fish dinner: satisfying, fishy, spicyhiking boots: sharp, indestructible, hardlettuce:inedible, disgusting, vile (一看就知道我儿子讨厌吃菜吧)还有很多就不一一举例了。总之就是要写好文章，词是关键。下一篇写扩张句子，make boring better.再谈写作（四）扩展句子 make boring better [引用]前面学的一直是词汇，现在开始延伸到句子。简单的叙述句很boring，要在这些句子中加入形容词把句子扩展开，生动化，make boring better。例如：The cat fell asleep. 很boring，把它改成 The tired cat drifted quickly off to sleep.看看儿子的练习要求：Rewrite the following sentences so that they are more interesting for readers.1)Stan jumped into the pool.Friendly daredevil Stan double front flipped into the cool relaxing crystal-clear pool and made a glamorous monstrous splash.2)My best friend is a nice person.My loyal best extraordinary amazing friend is unbelievably kind.（看了这句话我怎么有一种夸死人不偿命的感觉。）3）The dog wagged his tail.Joyous labrador wet dag happily wagged his over length furry tail and sprayed everyone with ginormous incredible amounts of water.这种练习很多，再写几个4）we watched the man during the jump.Everyone excitedly watched the scrawny man scared scream during the jump into a ring filled with ferocious lions.5)The sun shone in the sky.The ginormous lemon sun brightly shone in the clear blue sky creating a beautiful sight.6）Birds were in the treeNewborn birds hungrily watched as their tired mom brought back the delicious worms in the oak tree.练习还有很多，码字不易，就写到这，下一篇是magnify the moment.再谈写作（五）瞬间的扩展描写 magnify the moment [引用]学完了扩展句子，老师又教了magnify the moment。我暂且把它翻译成瞬间的扩展描写。就是要把一瞬间或一个状态扩展开写，要show not tell.老师非常强调show not tell，要求写作时要给读者描绘什么东西，而不是告诉他是什么。还是用儿子写的练习做例子吧。要求：magnify the moment 1）The pizza was delicious. 就是在文章中不能直接写出pizza was delicious，要描绘出一个状态，让读者感觉到pizza太好吃了。这就是show not tell。儿子写道：Sticky, gooey, cheese was hanging from my lip. Tomato sauce smeared all over my face. Pizza crust was being chewed by my mouth. Boy ,this is the best thing I ever ate.2）The streets were crowded.Large gangs of people were clustered together. Billions of posters and signs were flying in the air. The sound was as loud as a helicopter. Boy,everybody had come to see this rock band.下面这是一个标准的magnify the moment练习。要求写那尴尬的一瞬间。记得儿子他们写了很多这样的练习，但我只能找到这一个。3) As you leave the grocery store you realize that the ice cream that you just purchased melted.It is slowly sliding down your left leg! You see the cutest(boy/girl)in school coming your way!儿子继续写道：I was as nervous as a deer in alligator territory. My heart was racing with thoughts like "What if she sees me?" All I could think of was what to do. Ding! An idea suddenly popped into my head. As quick as a cheetah chasing his prey I bent over and lapped it up, even though everyone was glaring at me like I was a maniac."Oh no,"　I exclaimed she was coming closer! I ducked behind aisle 14 which sold glass bottles and hid behind them. Suddenly I started to itch and I reached my arm to scratch my foot. Crash!! The whole aisle of glass fell over one by one. Every spot on the crimson floor was covered minuscule shards of glass. All of the intricately cups were shattered in a million pieces! The sound could be heard 10 miles away! But then the worst part happened, She hurried over to see what the commotion was and then she saw me and the million pieces of glass. "Oops" I said my cheeks blushing. She suddenly laughed!"HA HA HA'' she giggled again then we went to the nearest amusement park and have a blast!!下一篇应该是命题作文了，终于到了写整篇作文的时候。从开学开始到2月底，他们应该写了20几篇文章，平均一星期一篇吧，但是因为作文的folder放在学校里，我没有看到，所以这一篇可能迟一些才能写到。下一篇我会加写一篇心得体会。跟踪儿子学写作的心得 [引用]先说说我为什么比较关注儿子的写作。我自己是个写作非常差的人，高中时很少能在作文课上交作业，课下费好长时间也憋不出一篇让老师满意的文章，写作是我不折不扣的软肋。而我这个儿子和我相反，从没把写东西看成负担，从K开始我就看他下笔神速，还头头是道，我认为自己会的东西，儿子也会那是理所应当的，基因吗.可是自己不会的，儿子比较擅长我就奇怪了，重申他爹也比我好不了哪去。所以我很感兴趣，比较留意他的写作。再回答一些妈妈的问题。我们州4年级州考有写作，因为一篇作文需要2个老师阅卷，阅卷时间比较长，所以州考安排在2月底，从去年8月底开学持续到2月底，整整半年，学校的语文课天天教作文。所以我说是正式学写作。我这个写作系列和我以前写的一些关于儿子写作的文章都是说他在学校里学习的事，不是校外的补习班。很多人都知道我儿子上的是家门口的公立学校的Full Time GT班，所谓的Full Time GT就是所有的功课（语文，数学，科学，社会）都是GT课程，全班都是GT生，老师是有资格的GT老师。没见他们用过整本的资料，都是老师发的复印纸，所以我也不知道有没有成品的参考书。言归正传还是说说我跟踪儿子学写作的心得吧。从去年8月底开学到2月底，整整半年的时间里，儿子他们天天有写作课，天天有练习作业，从练词开始，扩展句子，短文（magnify the moment），命题作文，轮番上阵，把世界上的万物万物差不多都要写遍了，强度之大，大家可以想象吧。面对这么强大的训练，如果没有4年级前的文字积累，是不是得抓狂。试想老师天天教导学生，写文章要用生动的词汇，可是如果脑子里没有那么多生动词汇，怎么办呢？我自己很知道那种感受，真是强人所难呀。所以写作的基础一定是词汇的积累。词汇的积累又从哪里来呢？肯定是书中，从READING中来。下面分享一个儿子他们班reading课的生词表，看看对怎么学单词是不是有一些启发。文章是Finding the Titanic(文章我没有读过，看到这个名字应该能猜到是什么内容吧)Vocabulary wordsshipwrecks,unsinkable,voyage,steward, iceberg, distress, stern,survivors,drenched,wreckage,funnels, loomed, portholes, crow's nest plaques,monument,courageous,perseveranceIdioms1)every cloud has a silver lining2)easy as pie3)not my cup of tea4)hit the sackSimile1）As quiet as a mouseVivid verbspersevere,appease,claw,assist,grumble,hover,wince可见他们reading的时候就把词分得很细，Vocabulary words和Vivid verbs还分开，一些特殊的写作方法，像成语和比喻都会讲到，词汇就是这样有秩序地积累起来的吧。我以前写过儿子3年级的reading 单词的贴子，有兴趣的去看看吧。http://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=224907还有一个我儿子自创的总结词汇的方法。http://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=226578写作绝对是一个持续的过程，不能因为4年级才学写作，4年级前就什么都不做。儿子学校一，二年级的时候，练的是混合词造句，就是把学过的单词混合到一起写一小段文章，训练的应该是词和文的结合吧。我以前贴过，没看过的去看看吧。一年级的作文和reading 词汇http://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=225048二年级的作文和reading 词汇http://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=225237三年级的时候，学习的内容主要是以reading为主，这一点我前面的3年级的reading 单词的贴子里有提到。所以大段的文章写的不多，但还是写了很多漫画书，就是老师给只有画，没有字的漫画，让孩子们自己写漫画中的对话。感觉强调的是趣味性和幽默感。我以前发过一篇儿子3年级写的文章。http://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=260580有了文字的积累和系统的训练就能写好文章了吗?我感觉还少了一样，就是写作源于生活，话说起来有点酸，确实是这样的，这一点将来我会在写作系列（六）命题作文中和大家分享。据儿子讲，老师要求写一篇 time management的文章，他写了他下chess的经历，得了满分6分。下棋是要用表计时的，输赢也许就在几秒钟之内，真是一个time management的好例子。 还有写一次难忘的field trip，儿子把我们全家旅游的经历写了进去，也是得了满分。生活中发生过的事情经过润色写出来，才有血有肉吧。说到知识的连续性，还引发一个题外话，跳级的问题。以后我会和大家分享我的看法。希望我的这些心得，能对大家有启发。对于有写作障碍的我来说，码这些字太费力了。跟踪完写作，我也要歇歇了。附录再谈写作（一）文字的训练是基础http://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=309349再谈写作（二）特殊的写作方法 Idiom Similes Hyperbolehttp://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=309358再谈写作（三）描写的方法 personification and sense wordshttp://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=309457再谈写作（四）扩展句子 make boring betterhttp://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=309471再谈写作（五）瞬间的扩展描写 magnify the momenthttp://groups.wenxuecity.com/discussion.php?gid=1173&pid=309726再谈写作（六）命题作文 待续