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华裔著名媒体人 Connie Chung首次公开披露50年前性侵史

(2018-10-03 14:38:58) 下一个

80-90年代来美的, 都熟知她当年的英姿. 至今没有华人乃至亚裔超过她在媒体业的地位.

她写信给 Dr. Ford, 坦叙封尘了50年的受辱经历. 平和叙述和此事件的暴力本质, 呈现强力反差. 有女儿的, 读着尤其令人堵心.

她力挺 Dr.Ford之余, 也是为了教育公众. 没被强奸, 性侵受害者也会遭受严重心里创伤. 他们会对很多情节失忆, 但被侵是不可能忘却的.

众多人包括老川以Dr. Ford无法回忆某些细节, 质疑她甚至公开嘲笑她, 是出于无知和试图为使暴者开脱.

感谢Connie Chung和她的勇气!

不想读的, 可听她念信:


Connie Chung

Connie Chung is a broadcast journalist.

Dear Christine Blasey Ford,

I, too, was sexually assaulted — not 36 years ago but about 50 years ago. I have kept my dirty little secret to myself. Silence for five decades. The molester was our trusted family doctor. What made this monster even more reprehensible was that he was the very doctor who delivered me on Aug. 20, 1946. I’m 72 now.

It was the 1960s. I was in college. The sexual revolution was in full swing. The exact date and year are fuzzy. But details of the event are vivid — forever seared in my memory.

Am I sure who did it? Oh yes, 100 percent.

I was a cool college coed but not that cool. I was still a virgin in the ’60s. I did advance to the so-called heavy petting stage, short of intercourse. I assumed that would come next.

I went to my family doctor to ask for birth-control pills, an IUD or a diaphragm.

His office was in his home, a classic Georgetown 19th-century house, creaky wooden floors with worn velvet Victorian furniture. His office was to the left of the front door, through double doors with glass windowpanes covered with tight curtains. It was a large room divided by a curtain he could draw. Half the room was his office, the other half his examination space.

Again, I cannot remember the exact date or even year. Yet I can still describe the following in detail. He drew the curtain, asking me to remove my clothes below the waist while he sat at his desk by the bay window. When I was ready, he came to the examination area and installed stirrups on one end of the cushioned examination table.

Here I was in my 20s and I had never had a gynecological examination. I had never even seen exam stirrups before. It was extremely odd to spread my legs and dig my heels into those cold iron stirrups.

While I stared at the ceiling, his right index finger massaged my clitoris. With his right middle finger inserted in my vagina, he moved both fingers rhythmically. He coached me verbally in a soft voice, “Just breathe. ‘Ah-ah,’ ” mimicking the sound of soft breathing. “You’re doing fine,” he assured me.

Suddenly, to my shock, I had an orgasm for the first time in my life. My body jerked several times. Then he leaned over, kissed me, a peck on my lips, and slipped behind the curtain to his office area.

I don’t remember saying anything to him. I could not even look at him. I quickly dressed and drove home.

At the time, I think I may have told one of my sisters. I certainly did not tell my parents. I did not report him to authorities. It never crossed my mind to protect other women. Please understand, I was actually embarrassed about my sexual naivete. I was in my 20s and knew nothing about sex. All I wanted to do was bury the incident in my mind and protect my family.

My mother could not read or write English, let alone drive. From then on, I told her our family doctor lives too far away. We’re not going to see him anymore.

Years later, I told my husband. When did I tell him? What year? What date? I don’t remember.

When the superb reporting of the New Yorker’s Ronan Farrow and the New York Times’s Megan Twohey and Jodi Kantor helped touch off this intimate discussion, my dirty little secret reared its ugly head and I told anyone who would listen.

I think the doctor died almost 30 years ago in his 80s. I’ve driven past his home/office many times but refused to look at it. Just yesterday, I found the house on Google Maps. Seeing it again, I freaked out.

Christine, I, too, am terrified as I reveal this publicly. I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. Can you? If you can’t, I understand. I am frightened, I am scared, I can’t even cry.

Will my legacy as a television journalist for 30-plus years be relegated to a footnote? Will “She Too” be etched on my tombstone instead? I don’t want to tell the truth. I must tell the truth. As a reporter, the truth has ruled my life, my thinking. It’s what I searched for on a daily working basis.

Christine, I know the truth, as you do. Years ago, my husband read a novel by Rita Mae Brown called “Six of One.” He told me, “There’s a great line in this book. ‘The advantage of telling the truth is you don’t have to remember what you said.’ ”

I wish I could forget this truthful event, but I cannot because it is the truth. I am writing to you because I know that exact dates, exact years are insignificant. We remember exactly what happened to us and who did it to us. We remember the truth forever.

Bravo, Christine, for telling the truth.

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阅读 ()评论 (16)
唐西 回复 悄悄话 一个自己以为解放自己,其实是自己毁掉自己,无法有凭证的metoo故事。
weston 回复 悄悄话 回复 '蓝调' 的评论 : 她特地写出令通常人羞以开口的细节, 就是告诫世人, 要突破自身心理障碍勇敢站出来, 直视施害者.
weston 回复 悄悄话 回复 'Etornado' 的评论 : 找本书看看自律神经系统如何运作的. 举个极端例子, 脑死亡的病人都可以经历性高潮.
Etornado 回复 悄悄话 性高潮是一种生理反应,与心理无关?哈,别告诉我们你是女人。
蓝调 回复 悄悄话 赞她的勇气。

“Patients, many of them Asian international students, stayed quiet, witnesses reported.”
Jane49Jane 回复 悄悄话 性高潮是一种生理反应,与心理无关。之于当事人享受还是厌恶这种感觉和心理有关,她显然在当时是厌恶这种感觉的,而且是认为自己被医生玩弄了。而那个医生不应该最后kiss她,这个是做过了。
ahhhh 回复 悄悄话 Dr. Ford无法回忆某些细节,可是这个50年前的事情还历历在目。这不是打福特的脸吗?
yijibang 回复 悄悄话 又是一个心理变态后的故事!
大方毛毛 回复 悄悄话 看来她当时享受了“被侵犯”,而不是害怕或者厌恶。
Etornado 回复 悄悄话 很多日本色情影片因为描写女人在被性侵中得到高潮,但几乎所有女性对此都嗤之以鼻,认为那都是男人自己的幻想,因为她们觉得在这样的情况下女性不可能有什么快感!所以才觉得Connie Chung的事情有些诡异。
Etornado 回复 悄悄话 楼下的,问题她当年可是20多的成年人,不是没满18岁的孩子。
ahniu 回复 悄悄话 又一个死无对证的故事。
清漪园 回复 悄悄话 我不明白这位妇科医生从他的所作所为中能得到什么乐趣,变态吗?作为妇科医生,他看到的只是一个生殖器官而已。
weston 回复 悄悄话 回复 'Etornado' 的评论 : 不妨把她的角色换成男孩. 他在医生的不断抚摸后射了. 但这不改变性侵的实质.
Etornado 回复 悄悄话 翻译一下:她意思是在她20出头的年纪,她去做第一次阴道检查时意外被医生用手指搞出一次性高潮,她描写得很细致,说全身还激动得抽搐了几下,后来医生过来吻了她几下。

快乐退休 回复 悄悄话 顶!!!