I can hardly wait to hold you,
Feel my arms around you.
How long I have waited,
Waited just to love you,
Now that I have found you,
Don't ever go. (Diana Krall)
After opening the profile, in fact, I did not log in the account that often and had never searched for anyone or taken initiative to send anyone a message. But, surprisingly I did receive quiet a few messages. Usually, I reviewed the profile of a sender first, and if I found somehow interesting, I replied them and chatted with them mainly through the Instant Messenger provided by the website.
Funny enough, at the beginning, most of the people I was communicating with are married men. Some claimed that they had problem with the current relationship, but would not break it until they found a new one; some said both parties had been upset by their marriage, but did not want to break it because of some reason, e.g. to wait for kids getting older; some were just looking for fun.
Of course, I clearly told them that I have no interest on any married men at all. In the mean time, I complained that to YM. YM asked me what I put in the file of what relation you are seeking to. Chat and Friend, I replied, because in mind that’s a start for a relationship. That was the problem, YM concluded, you should put Long Relationship there.
Listening to her, I changed the request on my profile accordingly and since I have never received messages from married one. It did work pretty well.
Couple of weeks after the profile opening, before I changing my request for long term relationship, once I logged in it while I was talking with my friend Connie on phone. I just upload a few pictures but keep them closed to everyone, and I was going to show Connie those pictures. Suddenly, I received an Instant Message.
- You like to have chat?
- Why you said so? I did not get him at all
- Your profile says that you are seeking for a chat and friend.
- Oh, that’s it.
In a mood of joking, I clicked his profile, gave the link to Connie and let her review it together with me. Connie kept giving me her comments.
- His English is pretty good
- Oh, he listed 13 requirements! But that’s not bad. At least he knows what he wants.
- Like music, like swimming, like cycling, like dancing…seems a very good match with you
- He does look athletic as his profile says, and his kids are very good looking
While she was commenting, I started my chat with him by asking one by one whether he himself meets those requirements. Of course, he did, and that was a pretty interesting and good start of such a conversation.
Since soon after he meeting me, he had deleted his profile on that website. Both of us could not remember completely about those 13 points. We only could list below most probable ones.
1. Psychological healthy
2. Love different kinds of music
3. Like cycling
4. Like swimming
5. Not still in love with ex
6. No issues with pervious relationships
7. Have a job
8. Like dancing
9. 38 years old or younger
10. Not Internet addicted
11. Might have one or two kids ((if you don’t, you must accept that I have two kids part time. But I’m not looking for a replacement mother)
12. Not smoke
13. Not alcoholic or take drugs