sadmadnomore

爱你太苦,宁愿孤独
Loneliness is not being alone, but with someone yet feeling thousand mile apart
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In memory of Drake Shaver

(2016-11-20 10:47:34) 下一个

On 11/4 evening, a HS girl was weeping on the dock while I was fishing, I learned her friend ended his life a month ago, that place was the place he caught his last fish. The next morning I found his name, it was caved on the dock.



 

 They're both senior in the same high school with my two kids, they went to the same west middle school with my kids too. In the 4 years when my elder kid was at that HS, 4 kids ended their lives; in the two years so far when my younger one was at that high school, two had ended their lives, the latest one is Drake Shaver.


I was sadden by her story, but I was even more so when I realized while he had someone crying for him a month after his death, I might have someone laughing even a month after.  After heard her story, I did not tell her mine but pretended I was talkinmg like him.


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I was attracted by every of your moves, but the only chance I touched your fingers was when you said goodbye. When I touched you I could hardly breathe, but you soon gave your both hands to the other lucky guy, ever since you've broken my heart. I knew I was day-dreaming when my parents told me my scores were slipping. I never had you but I felt I'd lost the whole world when I lost you.
 
Now I'm watching you, you're dangling your feet above the waver lake of grief, sopped in the cold sorrow moonlights.  I felt  you're touching my names, I heard you're weeping in dark.   I had been crying in the wind, had cried you a river,once I wanted you cry me a lake too. But look at the other end of the lake, I had left for the horizon, I'm in dim lights, in the cold wet air, in the splashing water drops. I do not want you to cry anymore.

Love  is blind, so close your eyes and hear your heart, I'll soothe you with my whispers in your ears. Go on your life as I had moved on. If we're deemed to be a family, I want to be your baby.

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学霸母亲,你在想什么?你很丑,又不温柔,养孩子不只靠淫威的!

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