This morning I was one of three scheduled persons to interview Amy second time within two weeks of time. Amy is a MBA student graduated last May from a well-known ivy league Univercity. I have to say that she is very sharp and exceptional bright both in her knowledge in financial world and the way she presented herself with well polished demeanor. In short, she really did her homework well.
Every year a school of young and energetic job seekers "swim" to financial empire in
Glancing Amy's smiling face I could somehow sense her high expectation and nervousness underneath. Her sandy blonde hair and her pumped-up poise in designer labeled suit and blouse highlighted her confidence, ambition and feminine beauty. Yet, I felt a bit sorry for her assuming she'd smoothly sail trough this round interview and the third round to get the job she wants. She would soon find out that she might have to leave her gender off at the door step and start to dress like man, work like man, fight like man and make tough decisions like man for years to come. Using a metaphor to illustrate she is about to open a Pandora’s Box. Certainly she may get paid lucratively, for instance if she does a good job her annual bonus alone can be double even triple her annual salary but the catch is that she may have to put up with 10-14 hours work hours daily plus many additional hours in her weekends, holidays and vacations.
I wished “Good luck” to Amy while finishing up my interview with her. The simple fact is that she may need it in order to join this highly competitive field. Let me lay this in simple way in hour and minute; she would come to work a 7:00 AM and leave after 7:00 PM, adding commuting time in car, or train or subway, that would take her at least 14 hours per day for work, that would leave very limited time for her private life such as dating or other leisure activity, besides weekends may not complete hers either in larger sense. It is not that she wants to be a workaholic rather she’d be highly likely trapped in her job not mentioning peers pressure. Several years down the road she reaches a biological point she may get panic attack, she may question herself seriously "Oh, my Gosh, where is my husband ? or where are my kids or where is my life". But by then it may be too late.
Recently one female colleague in her early thirties told us at coffee break that after painful deliberation she decided to quit her job in two weeks planning to get married to her BF whom is not her original choice and hoping to become a mother. "Congratulation for having done a terrific merger and acquisition evaluation " I joked "it is time for you to smell roses." (I wanted to say to smell diaper, but I didn't ), I extended my warm wish. She added that she should have done this sooner.
To the point, education and fairer macro environment have empowered women in many ways to compete with men in almost all fields, but do they become happier and more contented with their lives than their traditional counterpart years ago? Is pursuing career what they really want from their life or their highest priority ? Do they get more than they bargain for from the feminist movement ? There are definitely more questions than answers.
Luckily body-clock would not be a big issue for men , on the contrary men like red wine they might get extra points for more notes and characters as they are aging. But one thing is sure, if I ever get married I 'd hope my other half to work part time or stay home as a traditional women to enjoy fine things of life and family that may offer instead of fighting in "front line" like a man.
Ironically Pandora was given all the best qualities as a woman could ever desire by her Greek God, yet, in the end she could not fend off temptations of curiosity, selfishness and greed.
Notes:
1) Men also face Pandora's box temptation as well. As the matter of fact the consequences can be even deadly. For example President Bush thinks that going to
2) Don't get me wrong I think that women are smarter than men in many areas, it's just I personally believe traditional role for women would be offering more fulfilling and less stress laden life to women in general. But each woman is an individual and it is her own decision to choose what she suits her best.
3) Above Painting (Pandora's box) was done by British painter John William Waterhouse (1849-1917). His influential works were mostly female figures.
I think that you are right about that I’d need tough luck to find my other half who would be willing to help me to establish and sustain a good marriage that lasts our life time. However, I respectfully disagree with your notion that if women’s education, knowledge, skills and intelligence would not be used for their careers that seemingly becomes a waste.
Because of your comment I am going to try to write a bit more on this subject and examine possible scenarios further, please stay toned.
浦江客: Appreciate your time and efforts to leave your remark.
I do concur with your thinking that particular job may not suit for everyone. It is also true, many women would not want to marry someone who have careers that may involve dangerous working condition, high stress level and occupation hazard such as policemen, coal miner, investment banker, firefighter (i.e, on 9/11, 2001, over 340 fire fighter were killed in New York City in single day) I think that these women’s concerns are understandable and it is their life and they should have the rights to make the choices that meet their best interests.
Balance is the key in life. Wall street job is not for everyone, not every man,certainly not every woman.
A wall street successful husband is not every girl's dream either.
good luck to find the woman, who apprently needs to be intelligent(otherwise you will think she is superficial) but will not use it because she stays home after marry to you as you require, the woman, who is energetic and has verstitle interests to fullfil your taste, but will be waiting for her wall street successful husband 14 hours a day, because you have to work hard to support you and your wife's luxuray life.
if you can find that kind of woman, wow, you are blessed.