周三去gym后着凉，周四嗓子痛，周五发烧，气很不顺，于是拿德的问题开刀，一气呵成一篇声讨文章；周六烧退了，气消了，再看一遍自己的声讨文章，觉得很是无聊，有些事情，何必较真？前些天看到的那句话，--“成熟就是知道了也不说”，看来发烧的时候很难保持成熟的态度。

天气预报说，东京今天开始大幅度降温。晚上回家时，在电车上拿着书，却无论如何也看不进去一个字，望着窗外的一片漆黑发呆，突然间觉得很恐慌。总有这样的时候，开始怀疑自己所做的一切是否值得，是否正确，自己的努力是否只是在浪费时间，是不是永远也无法到达自己所期待的高度，永远也无法得到自己所梦想的东西...这样的自我怀疑是种极其痛苦的精神折磨，自信心“兵败如山倒”，随之而来的是带着绝望的恐慌，情绪在一瞬间降到最低点。最后，我竟然像个打架打输了的小孩子一样，一路哭着回到家。shower的时候，情绪终于稳定下来，开始认真思考，是否应该试着学会妥协，放弃现在所做的努力；想起这些天一直在读的书里的一段话，--after suffering for a while, the guy was considering to quit, then he called his friend for advices, his friend said, "why now? since you can quit anytime." the guy thought over, he had made a lot effort, and gone through tough times, maybe he already on the half way to his goal, so why quit now??? why not just try a little more, he probably would see the goal in the very close future...since he could quit anytime, if he wanted.

right, why quit now?!