被裁员的日子之(九)小闲的幸福时光重现
文章来源: 吉衣2013-08-20 13:07:03

三年前被裁, 小闲很快乐地度过了一年的闲散快乐时光。 没想好事再来, 今年公司关门,小闲于是又沐浴夏日阳光,重享幸福时光。

闲言碎语不用说, 话说这日朋友孩儿CAMP结束, 要求小闲代管一日:嘿嘿, 小闲爱和孩儿们混, 正撞到心坎上了。

清晨还在美梦里神游呢,隐隐就听见门铃,眯起眼看看表:惊一声: 啊~~~ 八点了, 蓬头垢面冲下去开门。

梳洗完毕,俩孩儿正玩电子游戏呢,根本无视我这个家长的存在: 也是, 谁让你一开始没做好当家长的样呢?日上三杆睡懒觉。。。。 心想得扳回点面子,就对孩儿们说:

一日之计在于晨, 总得做点正经事儿。

两个小美国佬,听得半懂不同的, 看小闲笑得像朵菊花似的, 傻了吧唧地点点头。。。呵呵, 小闲真快修炼成狼外婆了。

抖起做家长的威风来啦:

逼两人各吃一个
Jimmy Dean 三明治, 不吃不带出去玩, 结果不爱吃东西的俩个家伙都乖乖吃下

饭后, 儿子做中文, 朋友丫头不做中文, 好, 就给我做英文words lesson 不完成不出门耶! 结果都乖乖做了。

于是出发去公园, 看来看去, 沙子湿湿的, 就跑建了个沙城堡吧!建的差不多了, 开始 编故事。。。。

从前一个王国叫快乐国, 国王的城堡叫凤凰堡, 快乐国在国王的统治下, 繁荣昌盛, 富裕安康。

不拉不拉。。。。。。


 

呵呵, 看着有点意思,继续编故事:不久黑暗国王来侵犯, 国王派英俊聪慧的王子带兵迎战, 王子出发了, 国王不久却被觊觎王位的王后毒死了, 王后登上王位并宣布王子已经背叛, 派出最勇猛的武士前去击杀王子。。。。

哇,越来越有意思了。。。

正想往下编呢, 俩小人抗议:肚子有点饿了, 回家吃饭! 看看表, 不好意思, 都一点了, 玩起来咋过得这末快呢? 我问俩个小人有没有发现这个现象, 人家不屑地说: 一年级就发现了: 因为Recess过得总是飞快, 而social study is forever

回来做sushi 一会儿包黄瓜和蟹肉的,一会儿包蟹肉和牛油果的,一会儿包smoky salmon, 边包边吃,吃着吃着就饱了, 摸摸肚皮 打个嗝: 真不错呀。。

 

吃得饱了瞌睡上来, 两个小人咋办? 小闲眼一转, 机上心来:对俩小人说:你们俩很有编故事的天才呀, 刚才在公园里编的故事我都听迷了, 你们要不要把它写下来, 我可以印出来, 就像读Harry porter一样,好好读读?

 

两个小人很开心, 认为自己完全可以把这个故事编的更好,于是欣欣然到电脑前做best story writer 去了。

本老太太嘛,  本老太太嘛, 眯一会儿去养秋膘去了:-)))

 

 

一觉醒来, 两个小人哈哈笑着说: 开头写好了, 你要不要看? 我们认为我们的故事比你的故事好多了。。。哼!! 吹牛! 小闲心里暗想, 但为了表示自己是个有爱心的家长, 虽然很不想看, 也装做很开心惊讶地说: of course, of course darling, 别喝茶边坐在电脑前装模作样读起来

不读不知道, 一读没把我一口水呛死, 小闲大笑大嚷地说: 这个, 这个, 太
太好玩了, you guys rock! This is the best story I never read!!!

附上孩儿们写的the best story I never read, 博君一笑

The fall and rise of the kindom Sobec

Long long ago,  far far away, where camels drink beer,  monkeys eat Pokémon and mother goose got stuck in an elephant’s butt.   There was a kingdom named Sobec.

 

Sobec was a wonderful place where most people traded with the nearby kingdom. (By 89708 miles) they liked to trade silk with candy. This makes sense because their currency is silk. It also makes sense because they love eating candy and they never brush their teeth. The nearby kingdom preferred trading with mouthwash because the sobecian peoples’ mouths smell like expired cow manure. However, one day, one of the messengers came back with a letter.

It read:

Your royal stinky breath,

Today as I woke up from my beauty sleep, I said to myself: What the heck! Why not try to take over the world again? But as you know royal pea-for-brain highness I can’t do that until I’m drop dead gorgeous, and I can’t do that because ran out of my favorite hairspray. It is called Beauty In Black made out of only the most organic crow manure. Since I am all out of Beauty In Black I expect you, the royal incurable foot fungi highness to be a friend and lend me a lifetime supply of Beauty In Black. Remember, it is made out of the most organic crow manure.

I shall be waiting for your reply most impatiently.

Worst regards,

Crowenstein P. Blackfartonvomite

“Why this is outrageous!” the king shrieked. Then he proclaimed that the prince and the royal army attack the dark  

 To be continued....

看官们以为, 两个版本,谁的写得更好呢???




08/20/2013by吉小闲

 

不经吉小闲本人同意, 请不要擅自转载本文, 谢谢