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Howto change a habit.

(2007-09-26 20:06:39) 下一个
Habit is the default way of doing, thinking and perceiving. If one repeatedly does something, it will become a habit. There are good habits and bad habits. To change a habit is so difficult. Stuttering is a habit. Smoking is a habit. Drinking is also a habit, Adultering could be a habit too. Those are bad habits.
How to change a habit, particularly, how to get rid of a bad habit? It is very hard. However, there are ways for doing that. The most effective way is to cultivate a new habit to replace the old habit.
Once upon a time, a philosopher and his three disciples traveled all over the wolrd to explore wisdom. When they came back, the philosopher asked his disciples to get rid of weeds of a field. One disciple pulled out all the weeds in the field; however, it grow again not for long. Another disciple toiled all the field, the weeds were out of sight for a while. However, it grew again on the new fields. The third disciple toiled the field and planted wheat on it. The wheat grew and weeds faded. This story telles us that to get rid of a bad habit, the best way is to cultivate a new habit which occupy the same place, which have the similar functions. Once the new habit becomes a default, the old habit will fade away. The old habit will not be gone very easily. It will take a long time to fade away. I have personal experience to show how resilience the old habit is. My office was in the second floor for many years. My lab is in the 11th floor. Each day I will push the 2nd floor button in elevator for many times. Whenever I went down from the 11th floor to the second floor, or from the first floor to the second floor, I pushed the second floor button. It has become an habit, i.e. a default. About four month ago, My office was moved to the 11th floor. I have no mean to go to the second floor anymore. However, I constantly press the second floor button whenever I go up or go down. However, the times of pushing the second floor button are becoming fewer and fewer. Four months have passed. Today I pushed the second floor button again when I was coming down from the 11th floor. We can say how strong a habit could be.
Stuttering is a habit. To get rid of this bad habit, I must cultivate a new habit. Once the new habit of talking becomes a default, the stuttering problem will be gone. However, I should not take it easy. It need to have the determination and hard work. I should not expect it quick. It has been strenthened for so many years. I should not expect for a quick fix.  I have to be kind to myself, tolerant to myself, loving to myself. To be caring, loving, proactive, optimistic are the key factors to pursue. Practice of new way of thinking, speaking, use the new way of talking in everyday life as much as possible. I will enventually get rid of this bad habit--stuttering.
 
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